Self-Talk___Say It Out Loud!

What happens when you dish out those F’s? Do you have knobs on your mirror?  Baby get ready because the dirt is about to fly in your face.  If you throw shades on a low-grade get ready to duck your head.  I looked into the square box.  There were some words that didn’t describe me at all. What was my reaction? I threw my head back and laughed. It gets better. I recalled a song recorded by Christopher Williams that was perfect for my internal hard drive.  Are you ready for the YOUTUBE MOMENT? Hit It! I Talk To Myself when there ain’t no one to talk to. People ask me why I do what I do. Hell! It is a strategy for keeping your self-esteem intact when the haters pour on the hot wax. Bottom line, just remembers when you KNOW you have certain strengths and somebody send you an email, fax, text, FACEBOOK, and state those skills are nonexistence within you, this is what you tell them. Better yet, go the butt-naked mile and show them. I think the public use the word transparency.

In the morning when I arise there are moments in my life that I don’t like myself and I disagree with my thought processing. So when another person crosses my path and tell me they don’t like me or disagree with me I am ever so cool with that.  I think they are right on target. I am not tripping off of what they think about me. Developing a strategy to put me back in circulation without being down on myself is ever so important. There is nothing wrong with talking to yourself. As long as you are giving yourself positive feedback about what you can achieve.  Even when you fail to give yourself positive credit for trying the task.  Words such as stupid, dumb, and especially the word retarded should not be in one’s vocabulary. We will leave Anne Coulter with the word “retarded.”   It is one of her favorite words to call people. Who is Anne Coulter? Every minute of a person breath counts. I won’t waste my breath.

Talking to oneself is a tool for loneliness and can help you tighten up loose ends on your decision. Come along with me and sing The Staple Singers, Respect Yourself. It is Time to bellow out some positive self-talking dialogue. We can sing through the dialogue with Michael Jackson’s, “I’m Bad.” Are you ready to Ease On Down The Road with Stephanie Mills and listen to some motivational tapes by Tony Robbins or Les Brown?  Go treat yourself to a psychological sit in with Dr. Phil or a medical spinoff with Dr. Oz. When you gather up the strength to reject that whirlwind shopping spree or turn down that molting triple chocolate cupcake lace with homemade vanilla ice cream go on the VOICE and sing with Bon Jovi, Hallelujah, or an updated version of Hallelujah with Susan Boyle. Take a deep breath and exhale with BabyFace singing this is For The Cool In You.  Every small accomplishment carries its weight in gold and needs to be acknowledged. For one person it may be tying their shoe and for another person, it may be brushing their teeth. It is an achievement and it is all good. Can you say it with me?  “It is all Good.” You don’t need to tip-toe through the tulips. Go ahead and get your sprint on.  You Can Say It To Yourself Or Out Loud!  Self-talk is cool.  Going after the pros and cons in the mooch-o grande decision helps bring clarity to your choice. You are listening to your external hard drive and can hear what may be the best decision for you.  YE-AH!

Well, You know it makes me want to shout, kick my heels up, throw my hands up, throw my head back. Come on now! Don’t forget to say you will.  Those of you who have problems with your attention span can reel in your emotions, strengthen your communication, focus on your mental processing.  For Real! For Real! You are not crazy. Unless you found some way to separate yourself from yourself you will be living with yourself when everyone else splits the scene.  Mavis Staple has started singing “Respect Yourself ” again.  Put A Little Love In Your Heart and Talk To Yourself when there is no one else to talk to. People try to bring you down. Worst of all, most people don’t need other people to bring them down because they do a good job of bringing themselves down.  All negative feedback takes them clean out of the box.  Turn your mirror on and adjust those knobs for some positive Mirror Radio-Hope. This is the mental Selfie uplift without the iPhone. Okay! If you find it difficult to give yourself some Radio-Hope it is TIME to get a grand guardian who will help you cheer through the tough spots.

If constant testing would have been done by the American Psychiatric Association (APA) there would not be so many people wondering why they talk to themselves out loud.  NLD should have made the DSM5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manuel of Mental Disorders).   Individuals who are diagnosed with NLD (Nonverbal Learning Disability) are auditory-verbal and process out loud all the time.  Giving Recognition to a hidden diagnosis, NLD is a developmental disability in which individuals demonstrate a mature vocabulary, rote memory skills, and excellent reading abilities. Children/adults can have difficulty interacting with other individuals, transitioning to new settings and working new changes (teachers, peers, associates etc.) and trouble with writing/fine motor coordination.  Reading skills are exemplary, abstract concepts need to be explained in detail because individuals with NLD have difficulty understanding metaphors, emotional nuances, multiple levels of meaning, and relationship issues. Descriptions of abstract concepts must be given simply and with patients.   If you want to give a real Impression along with Curtis Mayfield, concrete factual information is the narrative for We’re A Winner.  People with NLD are not EMOTIONALLY DISTURBED and never let anyone say boy you can’t make it because a feeble mind is in your way. No more tears do we cry because we have finally dried our eyes and we’re moving on up, moving on up. LAWD! Ham-Mercy we’re moving on up. Positively Positive!

Three areas are encompassed by NLD: Motoric (coordination), Visual-Spatial (Blind Mines Eye/can’t form visual images or gestalt impression/whole picture) and Social (English language is so abstract and have hidden meanings).  Social interaction is very easily misjudged and misinterpreted.  Awareness is brought to you just in case you see a person with no earplugs and no phone and talking to themselves. Don’t freak out it might just be the hidden disability with UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS whom the American Psychiatric Association (APA) failed to put on THE LIST.  The guy with the iPhone and the ear-plugs may not have anyone on the other end.  A good strategy for fitting in and not having people stare or calling you crazy.  Don’t be afraid. Go ahead and be Proud. Self-Talk__Say It Out Loud!

The Truth About NLD (Nonverbal Learning Disability) And Who It Can Resemble

One day the American Psychiatric Association took a really good look at the traits and characteristics of NLD Syndrome. Who did those traits and characteristics resemble? You guessed it, the APA. Nonverbal Learning Disability (NLD) has been around for 41 years and has not made the list. Sometimes when we look into the mirror or under our own microscope we do not like the reflection that bounces off the mirror. Even worse, we really don’t like the disease under the microscope. So what would be the best solution?  A cover-up will be just fine. The APA can drag their feet for years.  The American Psychiatric Association sees the correlation of NLD Syndrome to their Association. So why test or even acknowledge this syndrome?  NLD Syndrome might start popping up all over the place. It might just resemble too many people who are RECOGNIZABLE. If the American Psychiatric Association started testing for NLD Syndrome on a consistent basis, it’s no telling who might turn up on THE LIST.

Let’s take a look at the history of the American Psychiatric Association, who has decided to distance themselves from the Psychologists many years ago. The APA (American Psychiatric Association) was formulated in 1844 in Philadelphia. Their symbol carries 13 stars over a head of an individual inside a coin-shaped emblem. The stars represented the 13 superintendents and organizers of the insane asylums and hospitals which were constructed to formulate the new American Psychiatric Association. The APA has had a pattern of making irresponsible decisions for many years.  At one time homosexuality was placed on the DSM as a disorder. It was voted out and removed in 1973.  APA later had the Mission Impossible effect to change the name to protect themselves. The name of homosexuality was changed to ego-dystonic sexuality and later removed from the DSM in 1987. Once again the tape has blown up on the mission. The American Psychiatric Association is back to putting a crazy diagnosis on their list. They were considering putting Internet Addiction on the list.  Imagine that. For my NLDers who cannot imagine, it would be putting the Internet on medication and locking it up in an insane asylum for no more viewing. This would hide the truth about the APA and who they may resemble.

Dr. Allen Frances MD.,  who use to be a member of the DSM4 task force, wrote a very interesting article on April 8th, 2011.  The article was in Psychology Today. It was called DSM5 In Distress. This is how the Dr. Allen Frances List looks.

1.) DSM5 keeps missing their deadline.

2.) The APA proposals were reckless.

3.) They had poor planning and missed deadlines.

4.) APA over promised and under delivered.

5.) The APA procrastinated and has compromised the coding of the DSM5.

6.) APA poorly thought out the proposal.

7.) 1st draft of the DSM5 was written sloppily.

8.) APA gave extension and wasted these extensions in many ways.

9.) The International Classification of Disease (ICD) World Health Organization in Geneva codes and modification may have been compromised.

10.) ICD-10 codes were written to align themselves with the DSM4. What codes will be written to align themselves with the DSM5?

11.) A window of opportunity will be missed to place a significant diagnosis on the list.

CHARACTERISTICS AND TRAITS OF NLD SYNDROME

1.) problems with time on tasks

2.) trouble with organizational skills

3.)  difficulty with scheduling, disorganized, cannot project or judge

4.) can’t put their thoughts on paper/written responses,  can talk the talk but cannot walk the walk, problems with productivity when it comes to paper tasks, expresses themselves eloquently

5.) difficulty getting started on a related task, needs to be jump started to initiate plans or on related task, problems in the areas of communication, difficulty multitasking, difficulty understanding what is relevant/irrelevant

6.) faulty spatial perception, problems with executive functions, difficulty being creative and can only think in black and white

7.) difficulty with motor impairment causing writing task to be grueling, slow

8.) difficulty with transition and adapting to change

9.) talks their way through the motor task

10.) they constantly talk their way in or out of a situation

11.)  gestalt impressions (they just don’t get the whole picture)

12.) Problems with their decision-making process which makes it very difficult to understand cause and effect.

13.) trouble with alignment

These characteristics and traits of NLD Syndrome resemble the American Psychiatric Association and their work in progress on the DSM5. We may begin to recognize NLD Syndrome is more common if consistent testing were done.

It SHOULD matter if it is my house, or your house, the poor house or the White House!  NLD could be rearing its head in recognition and striking very close to home. (DYNAMITE, DYNAMITE)  There are many unexplained behaviors which have revealed themselves in the past years to many who are RECOGNIZABLE.  Dr. Allen Frances, I hope this explains why the American Psychiatric Association (APA) is off task. This might even explain why NLD Syndrome has never been placed on the list. Sometimes a reflection of who we may resemble may keep us from looking directly into the mirror. It is the FEAR, SHAME, GUILT, and HUMILIATION of being found out. The American Psychiatric Association may not be as credible as we may expect them to be. Who truthfully is NLD? Who does NLD resemble? WHY is the American Psychiatric Association (APA) keeping NLD SYNDROME off their LIST (DSM5)?

Coming to an IMAX  Theatre in May 2013, in 3D, the DSM5–Hopefully

Getting Zach on the Right Track

Scene:  Sparky SPD (representing sensory processing disorder) and Nicky NLD (representing nonverbal learning disability) visit OWN Studio to help a friend get on the DSM5.  Zach is having extreme behavioral problems. Sparky SPD and Nicky NLD came to visit Oprah to see how they can help an old friend out. The conversation takes place in the green room and Oprah has stepped out for a studio break.

Nicky NLD:

Sparky sit down.  Stop touching everything. You are going to get us thrown out of the studio. I knew when I came here with you it was a bad idea. What did you have to eat?  You are all jacked up. Did you eat anything with sugar in it?  Put that down. You are on sensory overload.  Don’t make me call 1-800-Jesus Christ on you.

Sparky SPD:

Chill Nicky, Oprah won’t mind if we help ourselves and take a few souvenirs.

Nicky NLD:

Oprah has a deadline to meet and we are here to help get sensory processing disorder on the list.

Sparky SPD:

You are not on the list either.  As I recall you are not on the American Psychiatric Association (APA) list nor the International Classification of Diseases (ICD) list.  Are you on the Center for Disease Control for prevention list?

Nicky NLD:

No, I am not on any of those lists. Isolation is terrible and no recognition is even worse.  There is no validation and this could hang us out to dry. The APA is trying to throw Aspergers off the list and merge it with PDD-NOS. You know that diagnosis is just not enough of anything to rate being on the list.  If Aspergers vanishes we will not make the DSM5.

Sparky SPD:

Are you serious?

Nicky NLD:

I’m way more serious than Sally Savant “splinter skills”.

Sparky SPD:

What are splinter skills?

Nicky NLD:

Splinter skills are very unique skills that a person has that are totally unrelated to their life but they do them exceptionally well. Savants are noted for these skills. There are so many skills that savants can’t achieve but they should always be recognized and respected for what they can do. No one should ever take any credit away from a person who can achieve the smallest tasks. It messes with a persons self-esteem and self-confidence. For many years, not making the list has done the same to me. I am treated totally different from state agencies, insurance companies, schools and their districts.

Sparky NLD:

Nicky, I was reading your tweets and I did not know we had all that in common.

Nicky NLD:

I spelled it out. As long as people point it out or spell it out for me I don’t get so frustrated.  It was about 30 tweets. I gave brief definitions of some of the disorders. I did not want to cause confusion because a few of the disorders get mixed up. Sparky we share and have difficulty in the following areas: hypersensitivity, apraxia, dysgraphia, fine motor, severe coordination, hypotonia, developmental delays, developing friendships and relationships (social domain), self-esteem, self-confidence, speech and language development, dyspraxia and our nervous system is wrecked.

Sparky SPD:

Are you sure we don’t have the same Dad? We’ve got so much in common. You know I always liked the song Papa Was A Rolling Stone by the Temptations.

Nicky NLD:

Okay Sparky, shorty by nature, don’t make me mad. People don’t realize that when I get angry it could be for something that happened 2 or 3 days ago. It could be something that happened for 3 or 4 years ago or even longer. The doctors call it a manifestation of one’s behavior. I call it being pissed off for a very long time.

Sparky SPD:

What strategy do you use to keep from going ballistic?

Nicky NLD:

You need to go process with a person that you can trust – like a doctor or a therapist.

Sparky SPD:

I can get pretty angry.

Nicky NLD:

That is the best time to go to your doctor.  They can help level you out by talking it out. If you don’t want to talk you can look at the ceiling. If it is your doctor or therapist you are going to pay them regardless.  You might as well talk.

Sparky SPD:

I need a safe area like you. I use to think that your mom was a decorator. When you told me she put those rooms together to calm you down that was really cool.  I love the fountains, candles and the easy colors she chose to make it like a spa. Why did your mom take the doors off the rooms?

Nicky NLD:

I cannot tell where my body space is.  Removing the doors just kept me from bumping into them. The look on your face was priceless when I told you we were in the closet. You thought it was a music room. You asked me where do I keep my clothes. I told you that we were sitting on them. You didn’t have a clue the benches were storage chest. You know I have trouble with hanging my clothes on clothes hangers. I don’t need to get frustrated.  My family always figures out a way to help me work around something that gives me difficulty. They remind me it is no big deal. They teach me alternative methods by verbalizing and pointing out what it is I need to do. As I practice the skill more I learn it and I’m ready to move on. If you tell me to go clean the room. I need to know exactly where you need me to start. They will leave notes on the computer or a sticky note on top of the computer for me to find my information. It takes a lot of work but my family wants me to be successful without the pressure. They continue to teach because I learn by a step by step method. It is habilitation, not rehabilitation.

Sparky SPD:

Man, your mama acts like she is McGuyver or Inspector Gadget. You know our house is so cluttered and it looks like something out of Rag Magazine. You know my mom doesn’t do well with changes.

Nicky NLD:

Sparky, your mom may need to change to keep your behaviors from triggering. The clutter and having no order in your life could be part of the problem. I’m not trying to place the blame on your mom or your dad. If they don’t know when it is time for them to learn. They have so much hurt, guilt,  fear, and feelings of hopelessness. All this can be changed with empowering themselves with education and learning about sensory processing disorder.

Sparky SPD:

How does your mom manage her feelings?  My parents just seem so beat down by my behavior.

Nicky NLD:

My mom and the rest of my family educate themselves on the material. She said if it is nothing up to date, She would take action, bring the information up to date and create a new format for people to learn. She and the rest of my family understand that I have a neurological disorder with unintentional behaviors. A characteristic of NLD is anosognosia.

Due to the nature of my disability, I do not have the ability to recognize the seriousness of my own problem. So I would see my peers like I view myself, not having a problem. Bottom line Sparky, I can’t put myself in other’s shoes to show compassion, empathy, and support. Don’t be frightened, I have come a very long way. Emotions are hard to teach.

Sparky SPD:

Man, that is deep. So what did your mom do?  I feel like this is a seminar.

Nicky NLD:

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. She said every adversity does not have to have an adverse effect. I have a difficult time understanding fear. She said this was a good opportunity to teach fear and other emotions. She stated that people don’t like breaking themselves down to the lowest denominator. It makes them appear weak. She said she wanted the world to know how much they are taking for granted. Their adversity would give them a greater strength  She felt if you could write, spell and read… then do it.  She expressed her fears and pointed out fears of others. I did learn a lot. I still have a long way to go.

Sparky SPD:

It is time for me to make some serious changes and start surrounding myself, with positive people, and those who have my best interest at heart. I have got a lot to learn. If you don’t mind Nicky, do you take medicine?

Nicky NLD:

No, I have several coping skills and strategies that are taught by my family members to reduce the panic, anxiety, depression, and stress. Whenever I decide to go out to dinner or a movie, I go at a time when it is not crowded. I go to a place where there is less noise. I enjoy music. Maybe Zach can read the book Musiophilia by Oliver Sacks.  One of the neuropsychologists gave it to me. It is an excellent book. I tried not to overload myself on social events. I get tired and I rest in a room with white noise and low amber lighting.  Social events I attend there are 3 being the minimum and 5 being the maximum people around.  They are very knowledgeable of my unique abilities. I use scented candles for relaxation (mild scented). When I walk, I take a backpack loaded with books for deep pressure. I have a fanny pack with mints, a stress ball, and clay. If  I get anxious, I return to my safe area. If someone is angry with me it is explained to me that the person may not be ready to talk. I have the same option as that person. I am never placed in competitive sports.

Sparky SPD:

Nicky that is a lot. Will we ever grow out of this?

Nicky NLD:

We don’t grow out of this. We grow up with this. We just have to work harder.

Sparky SPD:

I like that Bose Bluetooth you are wearing. What kind of phone do you have? I got that new droid.

Nicky NLD:

I don’t have a phone.

Sparky SPD:

What!

Nicky NLD:

One day  I was at the mall with my brother and he started complaining about everyone on their cell phone talking to other people.  He was so agitated and began to point out people who had Bluetooth attachments.  I looked at him and asked if he knew if anyone was on the other end talking. You know I process out loud and this attachment would keep me in sync. He took me out to the Bose store and purchased it for me.  I wear it all the time. Everyone looks like me but there is no one on the other end of my Bluetooth.

Sparky SPD:

You are going to have the whole world with phone gear and attachments paranoid.

Nicky NLD:

I wonder how many people are laying down their phone gear and looking at others with phones crazy?

Sparky SPD:

You need to cut that out.  Where did Oprah go?

Nicky NLD:

It’s getting late.

Sparky SPD:

Should we leave her a note or that sweater you have chewed at the sleeve? Why you do that?

Nicky NLD:

Sometimes adults with developmental delays have a tendency to eat non-food items. This is called pica. It is mostly seen in children ages 1-6 and mentally challenged persons.

Sparky SPD:

Alrightee! Let’s leave a message for Zach and his family.

Nicky NLD:

We need to let you know that you are not alone. To his mom and dad hang in there and be strong. It would devastate me if my family gave up on me.

Sparky SPD:

You are right Nicky. I don’t always see eye to eye with my parents. I wouldn’t want to be isolated or rejected by them.

Nicky NLD:

A good book to read with your parents is The Explosive Child by Ross W.Greene Ph.D.: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Child. It would be good for you to have an oral motor grocery list. When you become anxious/nervous you will have things to munch and crunch on and non-food items for your body.  Learn about your sensory system which consists of Tactile System (skin,touch), Proprioceptive System (muscles,joints and tendons), Vestibular System (inner ear,balance up/down and left/right), Gustatory System and Oral Motor Input (mouth and tongue),Visual System(eyes) and Olfactory System (nose,smell). Learn what calms your sensory system and what alerts it.

Sparky SPD and Nicky NLD:

We wish you all the luck in the world. We hope this helps.  To the parents of Zach, hang in and don’t give up. You need each other.

Zach quality time with mom and dad reading, listening to music, singing and playing games will help. You need a safe environment with trusted adults and grand guardians. Thirty-two hugs a day might help and you could use a good teacher or a mentor. A national cheerleader could boost your self-esteem. Lots of love and a stable home will shoot you to the moon.

We are rooting for you.

The Who Not The View Featuring Darlene Dyslexia

Scene:  A TV station, lights blazing and an actual live studio audience is roaring…

Mavis:

Welcome to “The Who, Not The View”  and our first guest, Darlene Dyslexia

Darlene Dyslexia:

It’s so good to be here Mavis. Love the earrings and shoes.

Mavis:

Can you tell our viewers today what new project you’ve taken on?

Darlene Dyslexia:

First I want to say something about my dear friend and longtime business partner Norvella NLD. She was unable to make it to the show today. We both have taken on the APA (American Psychiatric Association).  My girlfriend always includes her friends in her life and it’s about time that we start including her.  We are going to get Norvella NLD on the list.  Tell Anita Asperger not to worry.  When the DSM5 rolls around in May 2013 we are going to make sure that Aspergers hold their place.  Norvella NLD will have a place for the first time in our history.  Tell Wrong Planet.com to come down to earth and visit with us. We love them and we totally understand how they feel.

Mavis:

Do you mind if I call you DeDe?

Darlene Dyslexia:

Sure, I have been called lots of things in my lifetime.  I will be fine as long as people don’t get me confused with DeDe of Dextor Laboratory or Dare Devil of Marvel Comics.

Mavis:

I’m sure they won’t make that mistake. (sarcastic)

DeDe:

It’s really good seeing you after all these years.  Mad Mavis Behavior, you have really come a long way since back in the day. I just have to tell the viewers, girlfriend here wasn’t always the sweet  M&M milk chocolate.  Whoooo,  I’m proud of you.  You were a bitter b……… back in the day.

Mavis:

Hey! Hey!  This is a family show.  I’m here to talk about you.  Tell our viewers something about you (getting frustrated.)

DeDe:

Okay, don’t get your boxer shorts in a bunch.

Mavis:

Just answer the question. (steamed)

DeDe:

Now dyslexia is a learning disability that damages a person’s ability to read.  It will rise up and show its ugly head. People will notice that someone with dyslexia will have problems with speaking and spelling. When someone with dyslexia hears the sound of the words it is very hard for them to interpret and spell the word.

Mavis:

Who is the lowest man on the totem pole in your thought processing?

DeDe:

Well, Mavis, it would be what I hear, see, and notice.

Mavis:

Is your IQ connected to dyslexia?

DeDe:

I’m glad you asked.  No.   With me and others that have dyslexia,  reading and our thought process develop separately.  Norvella NLD shows strengths and weaknesses in her IQ.  My  IQ is normal but the reading kills me and this is where  Norvella NLD  kicks my tail and excels.  We are really just the opposite of each other. I have a left hemisphere disability.  Norvella NLD has a right hemisphere disability. We get along so well.  They say opposites attract.  She has a developmental disability that is neurological. My disability is not-neurological that is connected to the brain caused by factors in the brain that affect my ability to read, write and spell.

Mavis:

Is dyslexia genetic?

DeDe:

In some families, it can be inherited. Recently they have identified genes that show the person can develop dyslexia.  The Ronnie Booze family got it.  Girl, his family has got a whole lot going on.

Mavis:

Do you know if  Norvella NLD syndrome is inherited?

DeDe:

The last time I heard there wasn’t anything genetic linked to NLD.

Mavis:

Did they ever decide on a definition for you?

DeDe:

Girlfriend, I’m all over the place and it is hard to pin me down.  Maybe I can come back and do a show on all those hypothesis and theories about dyslexia and me.

Mavis:

DeDe let’s try to get through this show. So is that a yes or no on the definition of your name (frustrated)?

DeDe:

That would be no.  All of these associations have not reached a consensus on the true meaning of dyslexia. Don’t you think that suits me well?

Mavis:

I think it fits you perfect (irritated).  How did you do in pre-school?

DeDe:

Well, I have speech delays.  It takes me forever to learn new words.  Nursery rhymes I just dread.  They are so hard for me.  Sometimes my letters reverse on me.  Remember in the movie when Keifer Sutherland didn’t realize he was dead.  He passed by a shop and the reflection in the glass had the word Mirror reversed.  Kind of, sort of,  like that.

Mavis:

Earth to DeDe.

DeDe:

Sorry, I got carried away.

Mavis:

How did you do from grade 1-6?

DeDe:

Man, the alphabets were tough. Rhyming words and counting the syllables in the words are very hard. I cannot for the life of me put those sounds with the letters.  I needed an interpreter when it came to written words. If I hear a word with more than one syllable, me and Norvella NLD can really mess it up.

Mavis:

When you got older and entered Middle School, did it get any better?

DeDe:

No, my spelling was horrible like my girlfriend Norvella NLD.  She had this dictionary thing going on. You could look at her word even if it looked like it was spelled wrong, you could tell what the word was. It was strange…  it still looked like her word was 100% accurate in spelling.  My word was just wrong. The teachers didn’t understand and we both got an F.

Now I don’t think Novella NLD should have got an F.  I had a hard time reading out loud, everything was out-of-order, and I skipped over words.  Any word that was close enough to the word that I was supposed to say, I would use that word in its place.  Novella NLD and I both have trouble with organization skills.  We also have trouble with time on task.

These skills need to be in a treatment center, treating it on a daily basis.   I can’t put words to the right meaning. We both failed to know what is alike and different in words and letters.  Girl, we can crunch the letter together like you defragment folders on a computer.  We just can’t get the spacing between the words.  If Novella NLD and I have not seen the word before, it will definitely not be pronounced right.

Mavis: How are you getting along today?

DeDe:

Well, Mavis, I got so good at hiding being dyslexia that I fooled myself.  Everything runs its course and will reveal itself sooner or later.  People began to see through me. I want to make this perfectly clear to my audience.  I do not write words backward or move words around.  I have a tendency to put words that are not related to words that should be there.

Mavis:

What other learning disability you have in common with Norvella NLD?

DeDe:

Well, we both have problems in math (dyscalculia). Simple math can be difficult.  Higher math like geometry can be more understandable.  Higher math can become difficult and be very abstract like geometry to NLD.  We have problems with writing (dysgraphia).  It is hard to put our thoughts on paper.  Thank God for the computer.  I know Norvella NLD forgets letter formation and has pain and numbness in her fingers.

Mavis:

Well, Darlene Dyslexia, better known as AKA DeDe……..

DeDe:

Hey, did you ask me if you could call me DeDe??

Mavis:

On that note, I think we better go.

Darlene Dyslexia:

Okay, love you Novella NLD.  Hurry up and get well girlfriend.  I will be calling the AAP.  I mean the APA. Tell Missy Elliot, Queen Latifah, and McLyte that they can ball up my contract.  If this album has to rhyme it’s a no go. You girls know I have a major problem in this area.  Love You All.

Mavis:

You heard it from the Who Not The View and our guest,  Darlene Dyslexia.

Superbowl Game Time, Rockin’ the List

For the first time in the forty-year history of the franchise … the NLD’ers.   It has been a painstaking miniseries and a Pee Wee Herman’s Big Adventure, but it finally paid off.  The fans are quite mystified by the NLD’ers.  They have been around for years but no one has been scoping them out.

Walk with me.  I see Commissioner District.  Commissioner District can you tell me anything about the NLD’ers?  “No, who in the hell are these guys and what spectrum do they come from?”  The Commissioner commented:  “I know about Aspergers and my money on them.”

Aspergers is a tough team to beat.  They are not very sociable.  It is not that making friends and developing relationships don’t matter, but they only hold one special interest.  They go on and on about that interest and people become frustrated and think they are boring or only into themselves.  Well, it won’t be any love lost between the NLD’ers and the Aspies.  There will be no Hollywood hugs and kisses between them.

So, Bobby Tourette, what is the big rivalry between the NLD’ers and the Aspies?   Remember we have kids in the house, just hold the cursing down!  Well, the NLD’ers hold many interests.  They can converse on any topic.  The Aspies think that NLD’ers is the know-it-all.  NLD’ers volume gets pumped up on their vocals and then they’re in your face and in your space.  This is not intentional.  Hey, I get along with the NLD’ers.  The Aspies will let you know they are not interested.  You might as well find someone or something else to do.

Mark Autism you have been in the game for over thirty years.  You know what it is like to be Number #1.  What is your perspective on the game?  Jack PDD-NOS  it is like being at the top of the Billboard’s records chart. This is a very recognizable label.  You know how that works Jack PDD-NOS. Take, for instance, you are a little bit of this and a little of that and not enough to qualify for anyone’s team.  You need a real label.  Dr. Psych.  despises you.  Dude, get rid of the NOS (not otherwise specified) and you can come out and play with the big boys.  People might think you are that NOS caffeine drink.

Andre ADHD pays attention and tries to stay focused on the commentary,  but he can’t put the Munch and Crunch down.  How do you think the NLD’ers will do against the Aspies?  Well, Mark Autism,  this will be a bloodbath.  Right now,  Aspergers is pretty hot under the collar.  Dr. Psych and his followers decided to drop the Aspies off the list and put them down with NOS, of all players.  Do you know this will affect their insurance, state funding, and definitely affect their educations?

We are in for one hell of a game. I don’t know why they would have picked the American Psychiatric Association to moderate the game.  When the Aspies see the APA they are going to go off and start cursing like Bobby Tourette.  They are so focused on the list.  I wonder will they be able to play the game?  Do not mess with the Aspies special interest. The NLD’er just might pull this one-off. They have a lot going on. Winning this game means a lot to the underdog. For the first time in the history of forty years, there will be more testing, state funding, insurance coverage, school reformation, and they will be recognizable. NLD’ers will take their rightful place on the DSMV, hold their trophy in the air and wave it like they just don’t care. Keep your heads to the sky and they will be Rockin’ the List.