Scene:  A TV station, lights blazing and an actual live studio audience is roaring…

Mavis:

Welcome to “The Who, Not The View”  and our first guest, Darlene Dyslexia

Darlene Dyslexia:

It’s so good to be here Mavis. Love the earrings and shoes.

Mavis:

Can you tell our viewers today what new project you’ve taken on?

Darlene Dyslexia:

First I want to say something about my dear friend and longtime business partner Norvella NLD. She was unable to make it to the show today. We both have taken on the APA (American Psychiatric Association).  My girlfriend always includes her friends in her life and it’s about time that we start including her.  We are going to get Norvella NLD on the list.  Tell Anita Asperger not to worry.  When the DSM5 rolls around in May 2013 we are going to make sure that Aspergers hold their place.  Norvella NLD will have a place for the first time in our history.  Tell Wrong Planet.com to come down to earth and visit with us. We love them and we totally understand how they feel.

Mavis:

Do you mind if I call you DeDe?

Darlene Dyslexia:

Sure, I have been called lots of things in my lifetime.  I will be fine as long as people don’t get me confused with DeDe of Dextor Laboratory or Dare Devil of Marvel Comics.

Mavis:

I’m sure they won’t make that mistake. (sarcastic)

DeDe:

It’s really good seeing you after all these years.  Mad Mavis Behavior, you have really come a long way since back in the day. I just have to tell the viewers, girlfriend here wasn’t always the sweet  M&M milk chocolate.  Whoooo,  I’m proud of you.  You were a bitter b……… back in the day.

Mavis:

Hey! Hey!  This is a family show.  I’m here to talk about you.  Tell our viewers something about you (getting frustrated.)

DeDe:

Okay, don’t get your boxer shorts in a bunch.

Mavis:

Just answer the question. (steamed)

DeDe:

Now dyslexia is a learning disability that damages a person’s ability to read.  It will rise up and show its ugly head. People will notice that someone with dyslexia will have problems with speaking and spelling. When someone with dyslexia hears the sound of the words it is very hard for them to interpret and spell the word.

Mavis:

Who is the lowest man on the totem pole in your thought processing?

DeDe:

Well, Mavis, it would be what I hear, see, and notice.

Mavis:

Is your IQ connected to dyslexia?

DeDe:

I’m glad you asked.  No.   With me and others that have dyslexia,  reading and our thought process develop separately.  Norvella NLD shows strengths and weaknesses in her IQ.  My  IQ is normal but the reading kills me and this is where  Norvella NLD  kicks my tail and excels.  We are really just the opposite of each other. I have a left hemisphere disability.  Norvella NLD has a right hemisphere disability. We get along so well.  They say opposites attract.  She has a developmental disability that is neurological. My disability is not-neurological that is connected to the brain caused by factors in the brain that affect my ability to read, write and spell.

Mavis:

Is dyslexia genetic?

DeDe:

In some families, it can be inherited. Recently they have identified genes that show the person can develop dyslexia.  The Ronnie Booze family got it.  Girl, his family has got a whole lot going on.

Mavis:

Do you know if  Norvella NLD syndrome is inherited?

DeDe:

The last time I heard there wasn’t anything genetic linked to NLD.

Mavis:

Did they ever decide on a definition for you?

DeDe:

Girlfriend, I’m all over the place and it is hard to pin me down.  Maybe I can come back and do a show on all those hypothesis and theories about dyslexia and me.

Mavis:

DeDe let’s try to get through this show. So is that a yes or no on the definition of your name (frustrated)?

DeDe:

That would be no.  All of these associations have not reached a consensus on the true meaning of dyslexia. Don’t you think that suits me well?

Mavis:

I think it fits you perfect (irritated).  How did you do in pre-school?

DeDe:

Well, I have speech delays.  It takes me forever to learn new words.  Nursery rhymes I just dread.  They are so hard for me.  Sometimes my letters reverse on me.  Remember in the movie when Keifer Sutherland didn’t realize he was dead.  He passed by a shop and the reflection in the glass had the word Mirror reversed.  Kind of, sort of,  like that.

Mavis:

Earth to DeDe.

DeDe:

Sorry, I got carried away.

Mavis:

How did you do from grade 1-6?

DeDe:

Man, the alphabets were tough. Rhyming words and counting the syllables in the words are very hard. I cannot for the life of me put those sounds with the letters.  I needed an interpreter when it came to written words. If I hear a word with more than one syllable, me and Norvella NLD can really mess it up.

Mavis:

When you got older and entered Middle School, did it get any better?

DeDe:

No, my spelling was horrible like my girlfriend Norvella NLD.  She had this dictionary thing going on. You could look at her word even if it looked like it was spelled wrong, you could tell what the word was. It was strange…  it still looked like her word was 100% accurate in spelling.  My word was just wrong. The teachers didn’t understand and we both got an F.

Now I don’t think Novella NLD should have got an F.  I had a hard time reading out loud, everything was out-of-order, and I skipped over words.  Any word that was close enough to the word that I was supposed to say, I would use that word in its place.  Novella NLD and I both have trouble with organization skills.  We also have trouble with time on task.

These skills need to be in a treatment center, treating it on a daily basis.   I can’t put words to the right meaning. We both failed to know what is alike and different in words and letters.  Girl, we can crunch the letter together like you defragment folders on a computer.  We just can’t get the spacing between the words.  If Novella NLD and I have not seen the word before, it will definitely not be pronounced right.

Mavis: How are you getting along today?

DeDe:

Well, Mavis, I got so good at hiding being dyslexia that I fooled myself.  Everything runs its course and will reveal itself sooner or later.  People began to see through me. I want to make this perfectly clear to my audience.  I do not write words backward or move words around.  I have a tendency to put words that are not related to words that should be there.

Mavis:

What other learning disability you have in common with Norvella NLD?

DeDe:

Well, we both have problems in math (dyscalculia). Simple math can be difficult.  Higher math like geometry can be more understandable.  Higher math can become difficult and be very abstract like geometry to NLD.  We have problems with writing (dysgraphia).  It is hard to put our thoughts on paper.  Thank God for the computer.  I know Norvella NLD forgets letter formation and has pain and numbness in her fingers.

Mavis:

Well, Darlene Dyslexia, better known as AKA DeDe……..

DeDe:

Hey, did you ask me if you could call me DeDe??

Mavis:

On that note, I think we better go.

Darlene Dyslexia:

Okay, love you Novella NLD.  Hurry up and get well girlfriend.  I will be calling the AAP.  I mean the APA. Tell Missy Elliot, Queen Latifah, and McLyte that they can ball up my contract.  If this album has to rhyme it’s a no go. You girls know I have a major problem in this area.  Love You All.

Mavis:

You heard it from the Who Not The View and our guest,  Darlene Dyslexia.