Reflection Of Words, Magical Moments On Twitter

Whenever I am tweeting on Twitter my thoughts and my heart is always with the ones who have difficulty communicating their thoughts and putting them on paper.  For those of us that can put our thoughts to the grindstone, it may take one word or just a phrase to speak volumes.

I would like to reflect back on some words and phrases which are magical moments on Twitter. There are times when the fewer words spoken reveals more. The more words spoken reveals less. There comes a moment of silence that can reveal all.

1.)  To all the achievers around the world with extraordinary minds, unique abilities, and multi-level learning styles… keep achieving.

2.) To all the achievers around the world appreciate your mind and respect the achievement.

3.) Live in the moment, for the moment, never in the past of that moment, the moment is Now.

4.) The greatest achievement is to realize what you achieved can be stripped away.

5.) No one should compromise who they are to become what you want them to be. We need to adapt and change our way of thinking. It is called acceptance.

6.) I do not wish to cut the tree down. I just want to make a dent. It is my TIME to give back.

7.)When you break yourself down to the lowest denominator, you are not weak, you are better understood.

8.) Bask in the sun. Feel the rain on your face. Dig your feet into the sand. Breathe on the mirror. Respect TIME.

9.) When you reach out and help others the time passes. Before you know it, your time is lengthened.

10.) Remember to check your airflow, breath on the mirror, it is your breath, it is your life.

11.) I am not a Mac Genius. I am not Microsoft Genius. I am a Mom Genius and my son taught me. He holds the honorary degree.

12.) We need to rethink the way we think and accommodate those that process differently.

13.) When I use the word I, it is for taking responsibility. It is not the selfish I, or the I nucleus factor. I will give you credit.

14.) Do you know your cancers? Anyone or anything that eats at you are cancers.

15.) We all can be heard. The skill is listening. The ultimate skill is understanding what we hear and what is being said.

16.) Survival-acceptance of the problem, educate yourself, respect and fear the problem, get help, and be self-determined to survive the problem.

17.) Your coat fits likes an armor. Your armor, in given time, will wear like a vest, Reflection of these times will be your windbreaker.

18.) Education is wonderful when you educate. Understanding and adaptability to how one is educated are greater.

19.) Inclusion in the workforce builds character, self-esteem, and validation. The isolation/deprivation causes lack of hope.

20.) Speaking from my heart zone today, when 365 days becomes less in one’s life, you will begin to value so much more.

21.) Everyone has a voice and a choice, a place, and space, and a reason throughout the season.

22.) I live my life for the 5Ps. Purpose-reason, Passion-true intense emotion, Placement-in position to accommodate others, Productivity-output, Power-effectiveness for an extension of 365 days of my life and to help others.

23.) Know your cancers in order to eradicate the problem, survive, and have a quality of life.

24.) Relinquish being a V.I.P.(Vanity, Image, Pride). You will never survive any adversity with these elements.

25.) When you live to the fullest, love until your heart is content, and don’t give all your love away, you are PAID IN FULL.

26.) If you don’t love yourself in the process, give too much of yourself away, you will lose life’s battle and become EXPIRED.

27.) I never understood the saying, is the glass half empty or is the glass half full. I thought the glass was a tool to work with and what I put in the glass would account for my achievements.

28.) Empowerment is knowing your cancers and realizing they are not just under the microscope.

29.) Never hold anyone accountable for that which you fail to teach. Never assume they know. If you make the assumption you failed them. Go back and teach.

30.) Handle your business or your business will handle you. This is accountability.

31.) I have learned to survive my adversities, not people in order to have the quality of life.

32.) True respect for life and quality of life is the losses we have in life.

33.) Love to Learn, Learn to Love, Love, Learn, and Live to Survive.

34.) Make the decision and be held accountable for the decision. Don’t blame for the decision. It was your decision, learn.

35.) See with your mind and envision. Feel with your heart and show true emotion. Speak the words and become expressive.

36.) Can you handle the candle?  Can you handle the burns?

37.) I have held the hands of many who have exited this life. Through all the tears, hurt, pain, and sorrow,  TIME was the key.

38.) Sit close to someone and read a book together. Sit in your favorite chair by the window and see for the first time.

39.) Take the time today and really laugh out loud. Give them a big hug, tell them you care, and really mean it.

40.) Remember when it comes to trials and tribulations, we can no longer be on trial, the verdict is in, and we can turn our tribulations into a tributes.

41.)  My misfortune is your fortune if you only look and learn.

This is dedicated to those with NLD Syndrome and others with extraordinary minds, unique abilities, and multi-level learning styles.

It is hard for children/adults diagnosed with NLD (Nonverbal Learning Disability) and others to achieve at light speed. Change, adaptability, and struggling with the element of time on a task can lower their achievement along with many other deficits NLD Syndrome possess.

Giving them more choices and accommodations boosts their achievements thus lifting their self-esteem in an inclusive protective environment. Understanding how they learn and also understanding that it takes patience. So teach, teach, and teach. Let them teach you.  Oral communication is necessary.

A very productive strategy for those who are diagnosed with NLD is teaching life skills, social skills, and body language communication.

Define the issue. Ask them what is it they need to do. State the options orally. Don’t overwhelm them with choices. Limit the choices (3-5). Get some feedback and ask them what would be the best choice. Let them make the choice. Time to take Action. Now it is time for Richard Branson saying, SCREW IT, LET’S DO IT.

He/she reviews their actions. You ask them if it was an effective plan or they ask themselves if the plan worked or not. Always point out what is relevant and what is irrelevant. Hey, if they screw it up don’t beat them down for their mistakes.

Punishment is not the answer. You will unmask an unwanted behavior and the behavior will manifest itself if you do not address it properly.

Addressing the behavior properly is understanding their feelings showing compassion, empathy, and being supportive. Spell it Out (concretely, explicitly).

Many words and actions in the above statements (1-41) cannot be expressed by those who are diagnosed with neurological disorders, with unintentional behaviors and  have developmental delays.

I Have Learned

Martin Luther King Jr. birthday was observed on January 17th of this year. His birthday is Jan 15th. On January 17th in observance of Martin Luther King Jr. birthday, I wrote a poem and posted it on Twitter. It is dedicated to the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. who sacrificed his life for the things I have learned.

I have learned through the eyes of death that one should appreciate life and all it has to offer.

I have learned to embrace the smallest of the small so I can retain true objectivity.

I have learned to love myself and validate myself. When the storm comes I will not lose hope. I will survive.

I have learned the extensions of one’s life is given purpose through the hinges of another that swings in the balance.

I have learned to stand down in the face of criticism, to honor it, and respect it as a teaching tool.

I have learned to show deference, to cry, to become a better human being instead of bitter.

I have learned to show compassion, empathy, and support, and rethink my thinking before I judge.

I have learned to jump feet first. I was so thankful for having feet.

I have learned to say,”Hello,”  and really mean it.   It was not superficial.

I have learned even when my hands touched deaths doorway, someone crossed over before me to give me a second chance.

I have learned to lift the spirits of those who could hardly lift their heads and they walked with heavily burdened hearts.

I have learned all across the nation ones achievements can be just as influential in Death as it is in Life.

I have learned even though it was not time for death to call out to me,

I didn’t view the mountaintop and I escaped the Promise Land.

I have learned to take a closer look at the hills and slopes and to better understand.

I have learned all in TIME,  Not To Judge A Man.

——————-

NLD Mom/cancer survivor

Getting Zach on the Right Track

Scene:  Sparky SPD (representing sensory processing disorder) and Nicky NLD (representing nonverbal learning disability) visit OWN Studio to help a friend get on the DSM5.  Zach is having extreme behavioral problems. Sparky SPD and Nicky NLD came to visit Oprah to see how they can help an old friend out. The conversation takes place in the green room and Oprah has stepped out for a studio break.

Nicky NLD:

Sparky sit down.  Stop touching everything. You are going to get us thrown out of the studio. I knew when I came here with you it was a bad idea. What did you have to eat?  You are all jacked up. Did you eat anything with sugar in it?  Put that down. You are on sensory overload.  Don’t make me call 1-800-Jesus Christ on you.

Sparky SPD:

Chill Nicky, Oprah won’t mind if we help ourselves and take a few souvenirs.

Nicky NLD:

Oprah has a deadline to meet and we are here to help get sensory processing disorder on the list.

Sparky SPD:

You are not on the list either.  As I recall you are not on the American Psychiatric Association (APA) list nor the International Classification of Diseases (ICD) list.  Are you on the Center for Disease Control for prevention list?

Nicky NLD:

No, I am not on any of those lists. Isolation is terrible and no recognition is even worse.  There is no validation and this could hang us out to dry. The APA is trying to throw Aspergers off the list and merge it with PDD-NOS. You know that diagnosis is just not enough of anything to rate being on the list.  If Aspergers vanishes we will not make the DSM5.

Sparky SPD:

Are you serious?

Nicky NLD:

I’m way more serious than Sally Savant “splinter skills”.

Sparky SPD:

What are splinter skills?

Nicky NLD:

Splinter skills are very unique skills that a person has that are totally unrelated to their life but they do them exceptionally well. Savants are noted for these skills. There are so many skills that savants can’t achieve but they should always be recognized and respected for what they can do. No one should ever take any credit away from a person who can achieve the smallest tasks. It messes with a persons self-esteem and self-confidence. For many years, not making the list has done the same to me. I am treated totally different from state agencies, insurance companies, schools and their districts.

Sparky NLD:

Nicky, I was reading your tweets and I did not know we had all that in common.

Nicky NLD:

I spelled it out. As long as people point it out or spell it out for me I don’t get so frustrated.  It was about 30 tweets. I gave brief definitions of some of the disorders. I did not want to cause confusion because a few of the disorders get mixed up. Sparky we share and have difficulty in the following areas: hypersensitivity, apraxia, dysgraphia, fine motor, severe coordination, hypotonia, developmental delays, developing friendships and relationships (social domain), self-esteem, self-confidence, speech and language development, dyspraxia and our nervous system is wrecked.

Sparky SPD:

Are you sure we don’t have the same Dad? We’ve got so much in common. You know I always liked the song Papa Was A Rolling Stone by the Temptations.

Nicky NLD:

Okay Sparky, shorty by nature, don’t make me mad. People don’t realize that when I get angry it could be for something that happened 2 or 3 days ago. It could be something that happened for 3 or 4 years ago or even longer. The doctors call it a manifestation of one’s behavior. I call it being pissed off for a very long time.

Sparky SPD:

What strategy do you use to keep from going ballistic?

Nicky NLD:

You need to go process with a person that you can trust – like a doctor or a therapist.

Sparky SPD:

I can get pretty angry.

Nicky NLD:

That is the best time to go to your doctor.  They can help level you out by talking it out. If you don’t want to talk you can look at the ceiling. If it is your doctor or therapist you are going to pay them regardless.  You might as well talk.

Sparky SPD:

I need a safe area like you. I use to think that your mom was a decorator. When you told me she put those rooms together to calm you down that was really cool.  I love the fountains, candles and the easy colors she chose to make it like a spa. Why did your mom take the doors off the rooms?

Nicky NLD:

I cannot tell where my body space is.  Removing the doors just kept me from bumping into them. The look on your face was priceless when I told you we were in the closet. You thought it was a music room. You asked me where do I keep my clothes. I told you that we were sitting on them. You didn’t have a clue the benches were storage chest. You know I have trouble with hanging my clothes on clothes hangers. I don’t need to get frustrated.  My family always figures out a way to help me work around something that gives me difficulty. They remind me it is no big deal. They teach me alternative methods by verbalizing and pointing out what it is I need to do. As I practice the skill more I learn it and I’m ready to move on. If you tell me to go clean the room. I need to know exactly where you need me to start. They will leave notes on the computer or a sticky note on top of the computer for me to find my information. It takes a lot of work but my family wants me to be successful without the pressure. They continue to teach because I learn by a step by step method. It is habilitation, not rehabilitation.

Sparky SPD:

Man, your mama acts like she is McGuyver or Inspector Gadget. You know our house is so cluttered and it looks like something out of Rag Magazine. You know my mom doesn’t do well with changes.

Nicky NLD:

Sparky, your mom may need to change to keep your behaviors from triggering. The clutter and having no order in your life could be part of the problem. I’m not trying to place the blame on your mom or your dad. If they don’t know when it is time for them to learn. They have so much hurt, guilt,  fear, and feelings of hopelessness. All this can be changed with empowering themselves with education and learning about sensory processing disorder.

Sparky SPD:

How does your mom manage her feelings?  My parents just seem so beat down by my behavior.

Nicky NLD:

My mom and the rest of my family educate themselves on the material. She said if it is nothing up to date, She would take action, bring the information up to date and create a new format for people to learn. She and the rest of my family understand that I have a neurological disorder with unintentional behaviors. A characteristic of NLD is anosognosia.

Due to the nature of my disability, I do not have the ability to recognize the seriousness of my own problem. So I would see my peers like I view myself, not having a problem. Bottom line Sparky, I can’t put myself in other’s shoes to show compassion, empathy, and support. Don’t be frightened, I have come a very long way. Emotions are hard to teach.

Sparky SPD:

Man, that is deep. So what did your mom do?  I feel like this is a seminar.

Nicky NLD:

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. She said every adversity does not have to have an adverse effect. I have a difficult time understanding fear. She said this was a good opportunity to teach fear and other emotions. She stated that people don’t like breaking themselves down to the lowest denominator. It makes them appear weak. She said she wanted the world to know how much they are taking for granted. Their adversity would give them a greater strength  She felt if you could write, spell and read… then do it.  She expressed her fears and pointed out fears of others. I did learn a lot. I still have a long way to go.

Sparky SPD:

It is time for me to make some serious changes and start surrounding myself, with positive people, and those who have my best interest at heart. I have got a lot to learn. If you don’t mind Nicky, do you take medicine?

Nicky NLD:

No, I have several coping skills and strategies that are taught by my family members to reduce the panic, anxiety, depression, and stress. Whenever I decide to go out to dinner or a movie, I go at a time when it is not crowded. I go to a place where there is less noise. I enjoy music. Maybe Zach can read the book Musiophilia by Oliver Sacks.  One of the neuropsychologists gave it to me. It is an excellent book. I tried not to overload myself on social events. I get tired and I rest in a room with white noise and low amber lighting.  Social events I attend there are 3 being the minimum and 5 being the maximum people around.  They are very knowledgeable of my unique abilities. I use scented candles for relaxation (mild scented). When I walk, I take a backpack loaded with books for deep pressure. I have a fanny pack with mints, a stress ball, and clay. If  I get anxious, I return to my safe area. If someone is angry with me it is explained to me that the person may not be ready to talk. I have the same option as that person. I am never placed in competitive sports.

Sparky SPD:

Nicky that is a lot. Will we ever grow out of this?

Nicky NLD:

We don’t grow out of this. We grow up with this. We just have to work harder.

Sparky SPD:

I like that Bose Bluetooth you are wearing. What kind of phone do you have? I got that new droid.

Nicky NLD:

I don’t have a phone.

Sparky SPD:

What!

Nicky NLD:

One day  I was at the mall with my brother and he started complaining about everyone on their cell phone talking to other people.  He was so agitated and began to point out people who had Bluetooth attachments.  I looked at him and asked if he knew if anyone was on the other end talking. You know I process out loud and this attachment would keep me in sync. He took me out to the Bose store and purchased it for me.  I wear it all the time. Everyone looks like me but there is no one on the other end of my Bluetooth.

Sparky SPD:

You are going to have the whole world with phone gear and attachments paranoid.

Nicky NLD:

I wonder how many people are laying down their phone gear and looking at others with phones crazy?

Sparky SPD:

You need to cut that out.  Where did Oprah go?

Nicky NLD:

It’s getting late.

Sparky SPD:

Should we leave her a note or that sweater you have chewed at the sleeve? Why you do that?

Nicky NLD:

Sometimes adults with developmental delays have a tendency to eat non-food items. This is called pica. It is mostly seen in children ages 1-6 and mentally challenged persons.

Sparky SPD:

Alrightee! Let’s leave a message for Zach and his family.

Nicky NLD:

We need to let you know that you are not alone. To his mom and dad hang in there and be strong. It would devastate me if my family gave up on me.

Sparky SPD:

You are right Nicky. I don’t always see eye to eye with my parents. I wouldn’t want to be isolated or rejected by them.

Nicky NLD:

A good book to read with your parents is The Explosive Child by Ross W.Greene Ph.D.: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Child. It would be good for you to have an oral motor grocery list. When you become anxious/nervous you will have things to munch and crunch on and non-food items for your body.  Learn about your sensory system which consists of Tactile System (skin,touch), Proprioceptive System (muscles,joints and tendons), Vestibular System (inner ear,balance up/down and left/right), Gustatory System and Oral Motor Input (mouth and tongue),Visual System(eyes) and Olfactory System (nose,smell). Learn what calms your sensory system and what alerts it.

Sparky SPD and Nicky NLD:

We wish you all the luck in the world. We hope this helps.  To the parents of Zach, hang in and don’t give up. You need each other.

Zach quality time with mom and dad reading, listening to music, singing and playing games will help. You need a safe environment with trusted adults and grand guardians. Thirty-two hugs a day might help and you could use a good teacher or a mentor. A national cheerleader could boost your self-esteem. Lots of love and a stable home will shoot you to the moon.

We are rooting for you.