Tag Archives: NLD Mom/Cancer Survivor

The Dash Before The Distance

by Linda Ballard

It’s very cold today. My body is engulfed by high-speed winds. The wind is circling around my ears and gnawing at my fingertips. The weather is not favorable. There are many days in our life where conditions are not favorable. It has become a long and exhausting day.

Taking this trip was hard but it is TIME. Yes, another ICON’s ship has sailed into the night. Her glow from life’s candle shifted as the wind-swept around the flame. The flicker of the light struggled but another strong wind caught her breath.

This moment of darkness and silence has claimed yet another ICON. DESTINATION has caught up with her. She has now boarded a cruise liner to ease her from this life of hurt, pain, and sorrow. In our hearts, we pray her spirit will be guided by an eternal beacon.

Let her soul be at rest for a pleasurable journey.

In life, some of us will run a MARATHON. The MARATHON is so rigorous with so many obstacles and hurdles to jump over. There are those who will SPRINT through life. If you’re a SPRINTER it is TIME to reflect. Don’t be in such a hurry to run a short race through THE DISTANCE.

You will meet with an early DESTINATION. When you hear someone make the comment “GONE TO SOON,” you’re beginning to understand life’s race can be shortened. Why are we in a hurry? We feel everything needs to be taken care of immediately.

How many laps can we run once the START button is pushed? Will we need to reset the start button because we have jumped the gun? Some of us will not get the opportunity to reset the start button in our lives. Will your life be a SPRINT? Can you endure the MARATHON?

A chain of events will take place on our life journey. There are TIMES when we will peek over into someone else’s life. We assume they have everything to live for. We are plagued by SHADOWING the lives of others. Our hearts are overcome with resentment, bitterness, and jealousy.

Finally, we graduated from HATRED ACADEMY. All the happiness, wealth, and power we assume an ICON lived, lies right there before our own two feet. What did we do? We stepped right over the most priceless commodity, TIME. We continued our HATRED CAMPAIGN.

This type of campaign diminishes one’s health and one’s life. The SHADOWING which is done to the lives of others has set us on a course for destruction. We yearn and grasp for what we think have made ICONS and other people successful. It blinded us and we lost track of who we could become.

We lost ourselves and we lost RESPECT for TIME. Reality is beginning to sink in. As the media reflects back on the IMAGE of the LIFE of an ICON, we realize we could never make the sacrifices in life to maintain the ICON lifestyle.

Bottom line: Never want what others have because you may not be willing to take the beat up for it.

Her music is beginning to rotate through my brain. As I walk through the stone garden, I hear her strong vocals bellow out “I Have Nothing.” The wind has picked up, my legs are beginning to weaken. The sorrow and sadness are starting to creep up on me.

I heard another rendition of the songbird voice. The tune was “I Look To You.” Many people say they never saw it coming. Did we PAY ATTENTION? She delivered a strong message in her MUSIC and in her BEHAVIOR. She went back to her gospel roots preparing for the journey home.

She was there to sing her last song with Kelly Price, “Jesus Loves Me.” She stopped in on CLIVE DAVIS, her long TIME mentor. She visited with Ray J, Brandi, and Monica. Bobbi Kristina got a chance to briefly visit with her Godfather. Brandi will never forget this birthday.

Sitting here on this stone, right at my eye level, is the DASH. From the day we are born to the day we die and have met our ESTIMATED TIME of ARRIVAL(ETA), there is THE DASH BEFORE THE DISTANCE.

The DASH is all the life one is living and what goes on in between one’s life BEFORE they run THE DISTANCE. As the leaves crackle beneath my feet, I notice on the carving of the stones there are a lot of SPRINTERS here today. I came across this magnificent marble stone.

The birth date is here, and the DASH is here, but no DESTINATION date. I wonder if the person was a SPRINTER or A MARATHON RUNNER? Was this someone who had not been found and declared dead? Maybe the person was found and no one knew the DATE of his DESTINATION.

People in our lives demand so much from us. We cannot possibly meet all their requests. When it is TIME for us to meet the demands of our lives, so much Time has been devoured. The DASH BEFORE THE DISTANCE is much shorter.

Every day from this moment on our ESTIMATED TIME OF ARRIVAL(ETA) draws near. We are so much closer to our DESTINATION. ALPHA is the beginning and OMEGA is the end. The DASH BEFORE THE DISTANCE is the life we are now living. RESPECT TIME!

A door has not closed. The door is wide open. It will give others the opportunity to reflect on their lives and make changes and seek INTERVENTION.

In Loving Memory of Whitney Houston and the Celebration of her Life.

To the Houston/Brown Family, Clive Davis her long TIME mentor/dearest friend, and the many relatives/friends who mourn the loss of their loved one.

Visit the April archives. Read Rest Peaceful My Nubian Queen.

Visit the May archives. Read Reflection of Magical Moments on Twitter, I Have Learn, Etiology Of Quality, and Giving Recognition to the Unrecognized__Saving lives.

Visit the November archives and read Smokelbg Life Class__Dedicated To Oprah.

May you find peace in my words.

2012 SuperBowl Flare Up_Look Who’s Rockin’ The List

by Linda Ballard

Scene: It is showtime, SuperBowl Sunday, and the guys are going down to ARTHUR BRYANTS to pick out their favorite football foods. Bobby TOURETTES, Andre ADHD, Jack PDD-NOS, Mark AUTISM, Mitt ASPERGER, and Leroy NLD are on the scene for the festivity.

Leroy NLD is checking out the prices because his girlfriend is not so big on cooking. He wants to show off his surround sound theater system that was built-in his basement by TJ SAVANT & COMPANY.

It is Bobby Tourettes turn to pay for the football bash today. Bobby is steamed under the collar at Mitt ASPERGERS comments. Mitts ASPERGER has difficulty interacting socially.

They are inside the restaurant and waiting in line to order their food. Mitt ASPERGER is looking on the wall. He can’t believe his eyes nor can he believe who has eaten at Arthur Bryants.

He has never had a REAL Community experience nor has he ever eaten in the heart of the city.

Leroy NLD:

When I wrote CHARACTERISTICS OF, this was in no way to bring any disservice to people who are diagnosed with NLD SYNDROME. We don’t get the chance to say or act like these PRETENDERS/CONTENDERS. Our problem is NEUROLOGICAL with UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS. I wonder what is their real problem?

Our butts would get hauled off to jail, medicated, and strapped down in a psycho ward. We sure as hell wouldn’t be in the Zone on PSYCHO TALK with BIG ED. Look at the gaffes MITT ROMNEY makes.

He has so many soundbites on his INTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS you can make a Documentary Mini-Series on the Discovery Channel. When I speak, they are real social blunders. I will repeat my blunders several TIMES in the same way until someone corrects me.

I do not understand that it is a mistake. You must remember a lie can never be told the same way twice. When I open my mouth you will begin to realize something is wrong. Ain’t gonna be no paraphrasing. I don’t do that. There is no such thing as retracting my statement.

My mind processes information differently. I don’t read people and people definitely don’t read me. Ask me or anyone else that has been diagnosed with NLD SYNDROME a question 20 TIMES. Guess what, you are going to get the same answer 20 TIMES.

You’re not going to get an endorsement from me. If your policy stinks you will be the first to know. MITT ROMNEY has to buy votes, buy states, and buy friends. MITT ROMNEY was PASS INTERFERENCE on OBAMACARE.

His plan had a lot of the same ingredients of OBAMACARE. MITT ROMNEY passed on the plan. The first thing PRESIDENT OBAMA did when he was sworn into office was Bridge the gap by developing friends and relationships in Foreign countries to strengthen Foreign policy.

He made 4 vital phone calls. He was reaching out to other nations. The next day he was at the State Department visiting with the foreign service officers getting everyone PUMPED UP and ENERGIZED once again on worldwide international relationships.

NLDERS have a horrible TIME with relationships. All relationships are FOREIGN to us. Why do you think people with NLD SYNDROME need an Interpreter and an Understanding Manual? A lot of people underestimated the PRESIDENT on FOREIGN AFFAIRS but he caught on pretty quick.

There is a lot more than WE THE PEOPLE and OUR NATION understands under the leadership of PRESIDENT OBAMA. He has been to more countries than any PRESIDENT that has ever been in office. On the LIST of CHARACTERISTICS OF, he definitely ROCKS THE LIST and gets an A+.

Who is Rockin’ The List of BEHAVIORS? What CONTENDERS and government officials are getting away with PSYCHOLOGICAL ASSAULTS?

Bobby Tourette:

Leroy, why didn’t you talk to Mitt before coming to the inner city. Mitt ASPERGER got a lot to learn and today is not the day to teach him. You know he is going to get on the topic he likes. He will not be able to tell when others have lost interest in his topic.

Mitt ASPERGER will continue on this topic for days. You know this will piss someone off. I just wanted a barbecue sandwich. Hell, I don’t want to be on ARTHUR BRYANTS menu as Bobby burnt ends. Lord, please let me save my A.. for another day.

I hope we don’t get into a fight like we did the last TIME. SUPER BOWL or not, I ain’t going to jail. We do not have a get out of jail free card like MITT ROMNEY, NEWT GINGRICH, and RICK SANTORUM. The courts don’t understand Asperger or any other disorder.

Leroy NLD:

Yes, I heard him. Did you hear what you said? Inner City is fighting words also. I wanted MITT ASPERGER to get a real cultural outing. Bobby, you always correct me. Everyone we hang with need lots of correcting. I just wanted to see if Mitt ASPERGER could connect to the people.

I thought it was cool when Mitt ASPERGER got slapped for trying to give people handouts. He will learn before the end of the day. This is the perfect opportunity.

Bobby Tourette:

Yeah, the last TIME we went to jail I didn’t need that type of opportunity. Man, that lady’s mouth was pretty tough. Not that I have room to talk, when I get angry, my Tics kick in.

The next TIME he will think twice before he tells someone, “I bet you $20,000 you can’t get any poorer”. Insensitive fool!

Even I know better than to make people feel they are beneath me. He has one special interest and it sho ain’t people. I love the smell of money in the morning, Mr. Money-bags of MONOPOLY, MITT ASPERGER. We know OUR Mitt’s behaviors is UNINTENTIONAL.

MITT ROMNEY has many soundbites stating he doesn’t care about the VERY POOR or the VERY RICH. I just want to hear MITT ROMNEY man-up and say he wants to destroy the middle class and confess he is angry because PRESIDENT OBAMA can sing better than him. Jealousy, NOT!

You know MITT ROMNEY is looking at those numbers. All the experience he has with spreadsheets and making money. You know his butt is ROASTED TOAST now that economic conditions have improved. The President has one hell of a chance of beating MITT ROMNEY’S drawers off.

MITT ROMNEY would need to be AFRICAN AMERICAN today instead of wishing he was MEXICAN eating at ARTHER BRYANTS. I would love to see his reactions. The good news is this restaurant receives all races extremely well. Bill O’Reilly has got to eat here.

Andre ADHD:

I know how hard it is for Mitt ASPERGER. I have said some stupid things myself but my medication alerted me not to get too crazy and bet with him. “OOPS,” did I just tell everyone I take legalized drugs? It sounds better until you overdose.

Then you realize you have a substance abuse problem. In my neighborhood, you are just a hard-core addict with stolen prescriptions. Why do we get the worst end of the stick? Jan Brewer, the governor of Arizona, gets to be called RADICAL.

Jan Brewer’s extreme behavior was an offensive personal foul and a 15-yard penalty for getting into the face of the PRESIDENT of the UNITED STATES. She should be fined and ejected from her position as Governor of Arizona.

She is a repeat offender and the ADAM PAC MAN JONES of the REPUBLICAN PARTY. Jan Brewer’s unnecessary roughness is for attacking the teachers, firefighters, and police officers. The Republicans in Arizona feel they can silence the voice of the UNION and any other public servants.

Whatever rites the people have will be stripped away by the REPUBLICANS. One thing they can’t take away is my inabilities of focusing, PAYING ATTENTION, nor my giant boulder. Every day of my life I’m leaning more and more toward becoming Bi-Polar.

Jack PDD-NOS

You know ANDRE ADHD, you remind me of RICK PERRY Off SIDE. You are off your line of scrimmage and you tussled with getting the answer right. Did they ever get your medication straight? Hey ANDRE ADHD over here, you just can’t stay focused. Get over here!

Folks in this restaurant think I’m talking to myself. NEWT GINGRICH is UNNECESSARY ROUGHNESS and KNEE CAPPING. He is really striking below the belt. NEWT is trying to destroy MITT ROMNEY. I couldn’t believe HERMAN CAIN endorsed NEWT GINGRICH. HERMAN CAIN, “MR SHUCKY DUCKY,” of all people.

Everyone knows HERMAN CAIN has been shucked like corn and his brain is plucked like a duck.

Mark Autism:

Leroy NLD talks out loud to himself. He explained it as processing his thoughts. Leroy said if he hears what he verbalizing he can process the information better. When LEROY NLD starts processing out loud, people think he is crazy.

Bobby Tourette always says when Leroy gets mad he will hold that thought and won’t ever forget what someone has done to him. Leroy is HOLDING. He processes so much information. Leroy NLD struggles with applying old information to new ideas.

Adaptability is difficult for him but he is willing to learn. I can’t say that about the REPUBLICAN PARTY. They have a choice. The REPUBLICAN PARTY’S intentions are to HOLD the ECONOMY back. They refused to ADAPT. It benefits the REPUBLICAN PARTY and the 1% to keep things as they are.

Look at the BEHAVIORS of RON PAUL. Wouldn’t his BEHAVIOR be call HOLDING? RON PAUL gets a 10-yard Penalty for HOLDING onto past ideologies. He does tell you what is on his mind. The REPUBLICANS want him to go away because he exhibits annoying BEHAVIOR.

LEROY NLD displays annoying BEHAVIOR, not by choice, and we don’t isolate him. Everyone in our gang of six has annoying BEHAVIORS. We are singled out, called weird, and isolated from society. We have delays and our finest moments.

Mitt Asperger:

MITT ROMNEY wants to delay the economy and blame PRESIDENT OBAMA for making the economy WORSE. This is UNSPORTMAN LIKE CONDUCT and EXCESSIVE CELEBRATION. He needs to be fined and suspended. Maybe DONALD TRUMP will fire him. Can you believe this? Look whose picture is on the wall.

Is that John MCCAIN? There’s SARAH PALIN! Is that JIMMY CARTER? NO! That can’t be BILL CLINTON! It’s a miracle they came down in this community and ate with you people.

Bobby Tourette:

Did you just say, “YOU PEOPLE?” Hold up! You begin to sound like MITT ROMNEY. I let it pass when you made the comment about me paying with food stamps. I should have corrected you. Your NEWT GINGRICH remark didn’t go over to well and your BEHAVIOR got WORSE.

I know you didn’t mean any harm. You need to be held ACCOUNTABLE for your inappropriate remarks. I know you are Rocking the List but it does not excuse you. What you just said caused me to FLARE UP. It feeds my anger.

Mitt Romney has made many negative remarks, straight up lied about the remarks, and his remarks feed the PEOPLE’S anger. NEWT GINGRICH thinks he’s slick. There is nothing subliminal about his remarks.

Once you have survived HATRED or RACISM you will always know the flavor, the color, and the stench it leaves behind. Leroy NLD is our food order ready? We need to get out of here before Mitt ASPERGER cause a Race War.

The last TIME it was Nicky NLD, Leroy’s cousin, who got us thrown out for his remarks.

Leroy NLD:

Hey, man, the food is ready. Let’s head out. Well, Mitt ASPERGER what do you think about our trip today?

Mitt Asperger:

This is a real colored experience. What! Did I say something wrong?

Bobby Tourette:

We are going to get out of here and I will explain it on the way. You better be glad you are MITT ASPERGER instead of MITT ROMNEY or NEWT GINGRICH. Don’t expect a soundbite. Your mouth just wrote a check your A.. can’t pay for.

In the January Archives of 2011 go back and refresh your memory. Read NLD Superbowl Pregame. Also read Superbowl Flare-up NLD and Superbowl Game Time, Rockin’ the List posted in the February archives.

Characteristics Of

by Linda Ballard

BARACK OBAMA exhibits STRENGTH, COURAGE, and HUMANITY.

SARAH PALIN demonstrated UNINTELLIGENCE, SHATTERED INTEGRITY, and INSANITY.

NEWT GINGRICH campaigns as HOT HEADED and straight up MR. FEROCIOUS.

MITT ROMNEY campaigns as MR. INDECISIVE, MONEY BAGS of ARROGANCE, and BRAGGADOCIOUS.

HERMAN CAIN manifested as “PIMP DADDY INFIDELITY”.

In the 2012 Election, he has been written off as a LIABILITY.

RICK SANTORUM came across as FATHER SANCTIMONIOUS.

JOHN HUNTSMAN, SGT. DULL and DRAB, never surfaced as NOTORIOUS.

RON PAUL, MR. NOSTALGIA, platform lingers in the PAST.

MICHELE BACHMAN, MRS.DELUSIONAL, her conspiracy theories didn’t LAST.

RICK PERRY at the debates stated, “I CAN’T OOPS” get it RIGHT.

RICK PERRY, MR.PERPETUAL GAZE stood like a deer that glances into the HEADLIGHTS.

Now, who would you vote for in the 2012 ELECTION?

I would vote for the person with a STABLE MIND and PROGRESSIVE DIRECTIONS.

Investigate the candidates from up ABOVE.

Remember these are TRAITS and CHARACTERISTICS OF.

Prime Time Hatred

by Linda Ballard

If you were to take a survey on why some people watch TV, they would respond, to get their Hate On. In Broadcasting, PRIME-TIME was always the TIME after the kid’s school hours and everyone else was home from work.

Depending on your geographical location, these hours would run from 7pm-10pm or 8pm-11pm. Due to modern technology, you can now get your PRIME-TIME HATRED on at any TIME. It is called YOUTUBE, GOOGLE, WIKIPEDIA, and social media and it can be watched at a later date or looked up.

I’m not making these guys out to be the bad guys. We no longer have to wait for Nielsen Ratings. Now people have the option of not missing out on so much information because of their work hours. Bottom line, the world is progressing at light speed and we need to progress with it.

How will we ever become a competitive NATION in this GLOBAL ECONOMY if we refuse to adapt to changes?

Dr. James Peterson, before my son was ever diagnosed with NLD SYNDROME I was teaching my children where to position themselves when they would speak to people.

I taught them how important it was to monitor their voice tone, and always give eye contact to the person they were speaking to.

In the Black Community, this was the order of paying RESPECT to your elders. It was the Golden Rule you were to NEVER violate a person’s PERSONAL SPACE unless they were your friend, family, or a close associate. At NO TIME were you ever to POINT your FINGER at a person’s FACE.

This rule was emphasized to my children because in the Black Community it was a KNOWN factor if you put your FINGER in someone’s FACE you were going down and may NEVER come up for air again. The person who stuck their FINGER in your FACE was the INTIMIDATOR or BULLY.

A person or BULLY who takes this action against you is asking for trouble. It would take an act of GOD to walk away and you would always be remembered as the better man.

Whenever you were spoken to, you were to always give EYE CONTACT to let the person know you are PAYING ATTENTION. When a child/adult cannot give eye contact this is a HallMark characteristic of social interaction impairment.

These are traits and characteristics of Autism, Asperger, and NLD. Children/adults with social impairments fail to respond to their name and often avoid eye contact with other people.

They have difficulty interpreting what others are thinking or feeling because they cannot understand social cues (tone of voice and facial expression).

These children/adults don’t watch other people’s faces for cues on appropriate behaviors. Our elders were addressed as SIR or MA’AM. In answering our elder’s questions we were NEVER allowed to DISRESPECT them.

One of my kids had a very difficult TIME socially interacting with people. Here I was off and running gathering information and finding the best doctors to evaluate his behaviors. At the age of 4 yrs.,10 months the answers were given by some PROGRESSIVE DOCTORS at KU MED CENTER.

By this TIME I had become SOCIALLY ISOLATED from other parents. Parents didn’t want to go anywhere with me because I had a “SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD,” (whatever the HAH HELL that meant) he would LET IT RIP.

Even when I tried to reach out to different support groups, the parents could not identify with NLD SYNDROME because they never had heard of it. Many of the doctors had never heard of it either. The Nielsen Ratings were out and I got much rejection because I was Black.

You’d think I was the only person in the Black Community that a government agency would say, “He had to be blind, crippled or crazy to receive benefits.” Well, what the Ha Hell, he never received benefits.

Whenever he started pointing and displaying his UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS, all hell would break loose. There was no room for embarrassment and I definitely wasn’t hiding my son in an attic. It was EDUCATION TIME. It has been a lifelong journey but my family has learned so much.

Some family members were divided and others were lost along the way. At the end of the day, there was enough love left to be shown to my son and other family members who stuck it out. There will be casualties, heartaches, but we will continue our commitment to a TEAM effort.

(And I am not SEAL TEAM SIX, but you do whatever it takes [DWIT])! I am not here to place the blame on anyone but I am here to take RESPONSIBILITY.

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, the very BEHAVIOR you displayed in your moment of PRIME-TIME HATRED against The PRESIDENT of the UNITED STATES can cost the lives of many children/adults.

Those who cannot read this body language may feel it is an APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR regardless of a person’s position. Children/adults with social impairment have trouble distinguishing authority figures and cannot distinguish who is in charge.

It is for this reason that hidden residual rules need to be taught. We can never assume that they know.

They may view this photo and think that this type of behavior is ACCEPTABLE and can be done to the PRESIDENT, a POLICE OFFICER, or anyone. It should NEVER be done. You have broken a rule, a hidden residual rule, and it is TIME for you to take RESPONSIBILITY for your actions.

What will you tell your 2 children, or your grandchildren when they see this photo of you pointing your finger at the President’s face? You have a tendency to retract several of your statements and have been called out by FOX NEWS for lying.

Come on, FOX NEWS? Ah, now you know you lied to the President. Dang! If FOX NEWS called you out, come on now, you’ve got some BEHAVIORS!

Have you not experienced this with your own children? Once again you have been consistent with your BEHAVIOR for getting caught in another lie. This TIME with your visit you had with the PRESIDENT.

Jan Brewer stated it hurt you to be called HITLER’S DAUGHTER but your father never served in the military. He was a civilian and died in 1955 from lung cancer 11 yrs. after the war ended.

It hurt me as a mother to see you put your FINGER on the PRESIDENT’S FACE knowing that this BEHAVIOR can get my son hurt or killed. The biggest hurt was to learn that you lied to the PRESIDENT and have continued to be a HABITUAL LIAR.

We are supposed to learn from our hurt and pain and not destroy the lives of others. I have attended many candlelight vigils and graveside services of senseless deaths of young men and women for this same type of BEHAVIOR. WHEW! Girlfriend, you are being CALLED OUT.

Cynthia McKinney, a former Democrat from Georgia, was kicked out of the democratic party because of her involvement with a capitol hill police officer in 2006. She hit the officer in the chest with a closed fist.

Is this appropriate behavior coming from the daughter of a former police officer? I struggle with Cynthia McKinney’s behavior because I know this behavior would definitely get my son jailed by law enforcement or killed in his community!

So just don’t feel lonely Jan Brewer, because I am not targeting you. Cynthia McKinney has some PRIME-TIME HATRED going on too!

PRIME-TIME HATRED revolves around the hatred, racism, and despicable behaviors of our government officials who have disregarded the lives of their viewers, a captive audience. When you are in the public eye you have to take responsibility for whatever you say, do, or write.

You are held accountable for your WORDS, ACTIONS, AND COMMUNICATION (WAC). Our government doesn’t realize that they are affecting the lives of a global community. Jan Brewer stepped outside that bubble. WE THE PEOPLE and OUR NATION are holding you ACCOUNTABLE.

So Jan Brewer what should we do about your habitual lying and behavior? Maybe if you had been in another country we might assume you were hailing a cab? Here in America, Homey just don’t play that!

Dedicated: To the young men and women who paid the ultimate price due to the misinterpretation of body language and were caught up in a senseless death.

Edit From My Heart

by Linda Ballard

It’s hard to CHOOSE the words to say.

I’m ripping myself apart.

MANAGING my thoughts can be delayed.

I will EDIT from my heart.

When I speak, I’m often CORRECTED,

Being impulsive, appearing rude, and considered not smart.

UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS can be DIRECTED.

I will EDIT from my heart.

CLEAN UP my social blunders.

Isolation fuels the sparks.

One does not SELECT to be asunder.

I will EDIT from my heart.

Throughout my life, I will be BLUE PENCILED.

MODIFY me like a work of art.

The hurt and pain removed from its stencil.

I will EDIT from my heart.

No, I’m not very POLISHED.

Take a chance and give me a fresh start.

Our friendship should not be abolished.

I will EDIT from my heart.

Being ORGANIZED is a laborious task.

It plays a monumental part.

I am truly glad it has been unmasked.

I will EDIT from my heart.

DEDICATION: To Jennifer G.

Adaptability is very strenuous and monumental for many people in every walk of life. Once we are able to accept a problem does exist and will continue to exist then we are ready for solutions to our problems.

The transition can be made if and only if we are willing to seek help for our problem. We are allowed more choices. We are better equipped to manage, organize, improve and preside over our new and improved life.

All this and more is hauled around in your LUGGAGE of LIFE. It is TIME to EDIT from YOUR Heart. It is early INTERVENTION to help diminish the PREVENTION of the pain and sorrow one may suffer. NLD Mom/cancer survivor

Smokelbg Life Class__ Dedicated to Oprah

by Linda Ballard

It has taken me a long TIME to get here. I’m so grateful and very appreciative to share my EXTENSION of QUALITY of LIFE with the world. To all the innovative masterminds that have allowed me to reach millions of people by the internet, Thank You.

I was puzzled when so many people became frustrated with Oprah because it took years for them to get on her show. Year after year has passed and I still haven’t got on her show. Did you hear me? HEll, I’m still ALIVE and it’s all GOOD. Year after Year!

Oprah has given out cars, trips, built schools, and funding to people all over the world to help their cause. Oprah is great a philanthropist. She has given hope to others and offered strategies, coping skills, and survival techniques.

She has laughed, cried, and worked all parts of her body to demonstrate the finest of NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION SKILLS her show could offer. It is quite difficult to teach emotions. Words and body language give out more information.

A lot of information is missed if a person has NLD Syndrome. Oprah turned herself inside out.  Oprah may not have realized the great gift she has given my son. Today I get the opportunity of my LIFE to share some of her TIME.

Think about it. The next TIME you pick up a TIME ADJUSTMENT SLIP at work, step outside the workforce and think how much TIME you need to give to your LIFE. Think about who you want to share that TIME with. No matter how long it takes.

Here I am sitting in the hallway at OWN Studio. Here she comes! Good Morning Oprah, thank you for seeing me today. The last TIME Nicky NLD  (Nonverbal Learning Disability)and Sparky SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) were here they didn’t get a chance to see you. They waited a long TIME.

I was proud of them for waiting it out. Nicky NLD has a very difficult TIME sitting in a chair for an extended period due to his coordination. He much rather sits on the floor because he has a tendency to fall out of a chair.

People have called him a clumsy idiot and stupid because of his poor balance. Sparky SPD moaned and groaned about the fabric on the seats. He kept saying it was a strange odor in the hallway. At the TIME an elevator was being worked on.

The construction work was so loud.  Nicky NLD had to literally sit on Sparky SPD to keep him from going bonkers. Sparky SPD has a sensory processing disorder. We are quite familiar with Nicky NLD’s syndrome.

We just had a refresher Course In NLD on 10/17/2011. Let me bring the viewers up to date on Sensory Processing Disorder. SPD Foundation had a writing campaign to clear up some false information and hysteria about SPD. This took place back in March.

Their goal was to have 10,000 responses by March the 4th, to bring in positive responses, and the facts about SPD. At that TIME people could register their comments on Oprah’s Website and post their letters in the section listed for ZACH’s STORY.

Sensory Processing Disorder is a neurological disorder. Our brain processes input from our environment. All of our senses need to come out to the playground along with their 2 major cousins and play.

The 5 senses and 2 cousins need to integrate or act as a team. The 5 team players consist of our vision (sight), auditory (hearing), tactile (touch), olfactory (smell), and gustation (taste).

The 2 cousins vestibular (sense of balance and movement), proprioception (the sense of knowing where one’s body movement in space) must come along for the ride. Hopefully with the wires connecting the ride will be smooth.

These are all separate wiring in the brain that needs to make a connection on the merry-go-round. If the connection is not made, there will be deficits in planning, organization, everyday life skills, self-care, work and leisure activities.

The bad misfiring of wiring to the brain will cause extreme avoidance, distress, agitation, fear, and confusion in the management to carry out one’s life in their environment. Children diagnosed with SPD mental processing are normal and have normal health.

They do very well with others as long as their external environment isn’t busy or overwhelming. Children with SPD become very sensitive to outside factors and this depends on the way the environment looks, smells and sounds.

Our 5 senses and the 2 cousins need to hop on the merry-go-round so our body won’t have difficulty processing the information in our environment. This particular disorder has UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS, not caused by the parent, and is physiological.

Treatment for SPD may target life skills, social skills, and emotional behavior. There is some exceptional information on Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). Visit http://www.spdfoundation.net and you are on your way.

Dr. Phil had done a show on a young man named Zach. Apparently, Zach’s behavior was so out of control he made some attempts to hurt his parents. Smokelbg wrote a story on Getting Zach On the Right Track.

This was to give Zach and his parents support along with some strategies and coping skills. Smokelbg wanted the audience to understand ZACH’s behaviors. He was viewed by the audience as a violent and dangerous person with INTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS.

The perception that people have when they are not educated about any type of disorder makes the individual appear to be so dangerous to them and society. This very perception and judgment leave the individual ISOLATED and without a sense of community.

ISOLATION is the KISS of DEATH and invites a MENTAL DEATH to an individual which leaves the individual unable to RESURRECT oneself. Those who have misjudged encounters, bullying, sexual, social, emotional, and physical abuse.

RESURRECTION from this grave site may be very hard to achieve if the individual has been stripped of their self-esteem and self-confidence. The body, once it loses hope and sense of purpose, will lose self-determination and cease to exist.

This grave site has now become a permanent address. Smokelbg wrote a story called Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep_NLD Mother’s Prayer when you get the TIME please go back and review this story. It is posted at https://nldrecognition.wordpress.com.

I chose 5 questions from Oprah’s LIFE CLASS that I felt it was very important to share with the WORLD.

1.) What is it really that I’m supposed to be doing with my LIFE?

a.) Teaching individuals to PAY ATTENTION, helping individuals to RECOGNIZE the importance of TIME and how important it is to RESPECT TIME by cherishing and RESPECTING THE QUALITY of their LIFE.

b.) Helping individuals understand the importance of Validation.

c.) Giving Recognition to the Unrecognized- Nonverbal Learning Disability that has been overlooked by our society for 41 years.

d.) Making people aware that NLD Syndrome’s, a neurological disorder with UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIOR is mirrored through the INTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS of people who can make the CHOICE.

e.) Writing stories, books, so NLD Syndrome is simplified/individuals will not find the information intimidating and will seek help.

f.) As a cancer survivor, I want to motivate individuals to LIVE BEYOND THE PINK.

2.) What is your gut telling you right now? What will you do about it?

a.) People are paying attention, I can hear it through their words, body language, and even what they wear.

b.) I am doing it right now by reaching out to people and getting the information out there.

3.) What are you grateful for?

a.) Being able to take whatever adversity in life and use it as a teaching tool.

b.) Having a masterful mentor and educator, my son, who has taught me whatever I CAN DO–DO.

c.) Breathing on a mirror, seeing my breath, my LIFE.

4.) What is the pain that you thought you would not survive and what got you through it?

a.) The greatest pain was loving someone more than I love myself. When I was diagnosed with cancer I realized at that moment I may not have enough love for myself to save MY OWN LIFE.

b.) When you look into the eyes of your children, family, friends, and see the fear that they have for YOUR LIFE, it all changes. The fight has begun. You want them to know you will do your best to fight back. There is enough love left to pull it off.

As your legs swing over the edge of the hospital bed and you wait for the test results to roll in, you can see the NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION at its PEAK. The silence in the room is unbearable. The body language will reveal all.

Whatever QUALITY of TIME that was designated I wanted to LIVE and LOVE MYSELF from this day FORWARD.

5.) If you were giving your last lecture what would be your best piece of advice for appreciation of life?

a.) I hope I have lived my LIFE in such a manner that even when I can no longer dress, feed myself, or bath myself someone will try to HELP ME near the END. Even in the last days of those final hours I will know, feel the love, respect, and appreciation for those who are there to mourn me. I would ask for a pillow and my mirror so I could prop my body up and say to everyone present in the room, ” I did not have to die alone.”

I would breathe on the mirror and know I had moved FORWARD from that MOMENT ON.

Smooth Operator

by Linda Ballard

I tried to catch up with you the other day. The pace was too much for me. It felt like a marathon. My legs are so much shorter. Just when I thought I had caught up with your stride, my body hit pay dirt. You left me hanging off the rail wishing I had a bottle of Primestine Mist. One thing about it, you were dressed to impress. The navy blue suit you wore was raising hell and the lavender tie set it off. The look on your face was serious. Your arms swung out evenly from side to side. It didn’t matter how many emergencies the city had, you looked as though you were ready to put them all out. Are you wearing your Gasoline Drawers?

Every person you encountered on the streets was given a strong handshake. Your smile came bursting through. Words of hope were given to all the people who felt beaten down by the economy. Then all of a sudden you sat down on the curb in your nice suit. Do you think Eric Cantor or Paul Ryan would have given an uplifting curb service speech to the people in their high dollar cha-ching suit? Don’t answer!

Wherever you were headed it didn’t seem important anymore. You were answering questions about concerns of jobs, infrastructure, voters suppression, and the Big 3(Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid). An old lady appeared from out of nowhere. Silence came over the crowd. You looked directly into her eyes and you reached out and held her hand. Then you said, “How can I help you?” She responded, “You have helped me.” You are learning to ask the questions. Inclusions make you a part of us.

Sitting here among the people you have included yourself. The Republicans tried to divide you from WE THE PEOPLE and OUR NATION. You have not let Pride override the welfare of the People. The Republicans tried to make the American people feel in taking out the dictators, it was only your victory. WE THE PEOPLE and OUR NATION understood it was a victory for all. You are starting to learn from your MISTAKES. Achievement comes with ACKNOWLEDGING your MISTAKES and taking RESPONSIBILITY for your MISTAKES. You have shown the American People deference.Through all the criticism you did not let your head drop below the water. The eternal flame burns deep inside of you. The Human Factor works in your favor. You have remained HUMANE.

The Presidents before you made mistakes. The PRETENDERS/CONTENDERS have taken it to a new level of mistakes. Herman Cain is the cousin of the other mother, Oscar OCD, who is always entertaining the NO NO THOUGHTS. Go back and refresh your memory. Oscar OCD was in EASTER UNDER THE UMBRELLA_FOR NLD. Oscar OCD always referred to his little cousin Herman, as Captain Nasty McNuts. Tyrone Tourettes, the cousin of Bobby Tourettes, thought it meant Herman liked McNuggets. AH NO! I don’t think so.

Strange that HERMAN grew up in the Restaurant Business. Since he made his POKEMAN SPEECH he probably needs to call PICACHO to the RESCUE. The next cartoon character he might want to be is a TRANSFORMER. Yes, Herman Cain is more than meets the eye. He is the original DECEPTICON along with the other PRETENDERS/CONTENDERS. Starscream, Herman Cain, cannot be trusted. He is always trying to find a way to overthrow Megatron, Rick Perry. Sounds like this is playing in the media right about now.

Megatron, Rick Perry, is at Lowes picking up paint for his METEORITES which is all wrong. Sentinel Prime, Mitt Romney, has switched sides and his numbers still didn’t move in the polls. This is the perfect world for Mitt Romney.

He has so many characters to TRANSFORM into. If I was Herman Cain I would stay with the TRANSFORMERS. He’s going to need a hideout within himself and a new theme song. No one will ever notice the White 1999 MONTE CARLO is Herman Cain in the junkyard. The sign will read We BUY, SELL, and OWN previous DECEPTICONS by the Koch Brothers. In Training Day, Denzel Washington drove the Black MONTE CARLO. Herman Cain is NO Denzel.

Now it is TIME to develop a trusted loyal Crew so you won’t look distant or be isolated from your base. Steve Israel, Head of the Democratic Congressional Committee can whip the Democrats into shape. Lean to the side of the strong Democrats who use the media. In Smokelbg Tweets she gives her thumbs up to Bernie Sanders, Debbie Wasserman Schultz.

We can’t leave out Barney Franks and Chuck Schumer, the Progressive/Liberal Democrats. You got the Ohio Players, not the singing group, the Democrats in Ohio. Sherrod Brown and Marcy Kaptur would be excellent team players.

The DEMOCRATS need to speak out and be compassionate about their leader. You have come a very long way. We can see your growth. Your message has gotten stronger. Son, I ain’t stopped BELIEVING in you. So you better not stop BELIEVING. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. BELIEVE IN YOUR PURPOSE. BELIEVE IN YOUR VISION. BELIEVE you are a SMOOTH OPERATOR.

Another voice shouts out from the crowd. SMOOTH OPERATOR, the REPUBLICANS are totally thrown off course. Their hatred is letting people around our nation and other nations know they have RESPECT only for the BENJAMIN’S BABY. All this business about your job ratings in the polls is at 40% is a bunch of sardines. Just think if we had Muammar Gaddafi for 42 years. Instead, we have Charles and David Koch causing havoc. We need to occupy their headquarters.

Who cares about those numbers? What polls are they reporting from? It sounds like Fox News statistics. Their math is way off the charts. They never do their research. We all know Bill O’Reilly is never WRONG. I do like Greta Van Susteren, Sheppard Smith, Geraldo Rivera, and Chris Wallace. Geraldo Rivera barbecues BILL O’Reilly’s butt. Geraldo is the chef of Burnt Ends. Watch out, Bobby Flay!

Chris Wallace broke down and told John Stewart that Fox News is Conservative. John Stewart of the DAILY SHOW keeps his Gasoline Drawers on and uses his flamethrower to set Fox News on fire. Fox News thinks this is the story of ROOTS 999. They made a lot of people have a “What The Hah Hell” moment. I guess Herman Cain is their Black. “What the Hah Hell” do they mean by your black/my black. Let’s send a friendly reminder to FOX NEWS letting them know that Slave Days Are Over.

Do they really have a Candidate? A young lady’s voice in the crowd rang out. With everything the Republicans have done to you, I would have blown a gasket. SMOOTH OPERATOR smiles and replies, “I need YOUR support.” War within Wars is no good. I am here for the People. The losses have made me gain great knowledge and great strength. I have Learned and Transformed. The past is just that, the past. The Moment is Now. We will continue to Press On. I will not be discouraged by Congress, the Republicans, and the TEA PARTY. The REPUBLICANS reading this will say I did not answer the question. We have to stop BLAMING. We need to Start MAINTAINING our government.

There are TIMES when we take Action, the Words are fulfilled. There are TIMES when we take Words and we may Fail to carry out the Action. Remember the word has been “NO.” Remember the Action was not carried out. Remember to do the Math. Remember that only 4 Democrats voted against the AMERICAN JOB ACT. The young lady asked, Who were the 4 Democrats? An elder man steps up and starts calling out names. It was them old tired Conservative Blue Dog Democrats. Roll Call Sister!

It was Senator Ben Nelson of Nebraska, Senator Joe Lieberman of Connecticut, Senator John Tester of Montana, and Senator Mark Pryor of Arkansas. I tell you what Sister, I can Remember 4 names. Baby Girl, all 49 REPUBLICANS voted against the bill. Now it is gonna be hard Remembering all 49 Knucklehead REPUBLICANS. Just Remember the Herman Cain Theory, 4+5=9 and you take out the (+5=) and you got 49. Maybe he will get 49 years for the 4 women he sexually harassed.

Why did it take 4 women and not just 1 of these charges to be acknowledged and taken seriously? Is it possible that a SUPREME COURT JUSTICE may have slipped through the cracks? Is it okay to label the poor and middle-class behavior? Why are we not acknowledging the behaviors of the rich and high-profile government officials? Go back and review GOT NO TIME TO BE DISABLED in the March Archives. You will find an answer.

A young boy around the age of 6 breaks through the crowd. His presence breaks the tension. “Are you who I think you are?” Somebody said you are the President of the United States. I told them No Way! You are the man with the plan. The man who understands. The man with the whole world in the palm of his hands. You are a SMOOTH OPERATOR. He jumps into PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA’s lap and gives him a big hug. He lifts the young boy into the air. “I will keep my Promise.”

ADVISORY ALERT: It is hard for people diagnosed with NLD Syndrome and other exceptionalities to come off as SMOOTH OPERATORS. Some may lack the social communication skills, inability to read social cues, and interpreting body language. Others may have trouble with personal hygiene, and cocktail party speech. They have difficulty interpreting facial expression. It is hard for them to initiate a conversation or end a conversation. Their social judgment is poor. NLDers are not sure where his or her space is and cannot judge the distance(space invaders). This is due to visual-spatial organization. They are labeled by others as annoying, ill-mannered, rude, discourteous, and smart “aleck.”

People diagnosed with NLD Syndrome cannot detect hidden meanings of language and social interactions aren’t detected There will be many outbursts, social blunders, misinterpretations, and misjudgments. NLDers end up being the victims and are victimized because they are naively trusting. They DO NOT understand a person that is deceitful, cunning, or who manipulates others. They have faulty spatial perception only getting half of the picture.

Their behaviors are misinterpreted by our society as being INTENTIONAL. Their neurological and neuro-behavior right hemisphere disorder is UNINTENTIONAL. Sexual Harassment is a term that is very vaguely defined. It happens a lot in the workplace. It entails social situations, the making of unwanted sexual advances, and obscene remarks. How would it be possible to charge a person with NLD SYNDROME with sexual harassment if they have these characteristics and traits? People with NLD SYNDROME will not have a clue to what sexual harassment or any other type of harassment is due to the nature of their neurological disorder and their UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS.

My advice to all parents is finding a neuro-psychologist or psychiatrist that has had years of knowledge, training, and experience in the field of Nonverbal Learning Disability. It is very essential that you have your child tested early. This diagnosis has been overlooked for 41 years and has not been placed on the DSM4. This is a great disservice to millions of people who are looking for answers for their children/adults. When AUTISM, ASPERGER, ADD, ADHD, PDD-NOS, OCD, TOURETTES SYNDROME, ANXIETY DISORDER, TIC DISORDER, just doesn’t add up, PLEASE turn YOUR ATTENTION to NLD SYNDROME

How many TIMES have people with NLD SYNDROME diagnosed/undiagnosed been falsely accused, misjudged, socially isolated, and punished repeatedly because society has failed to be educated about this neurological disorder?
How many people are locked away in institutions, given a counterproductive treatment plan, or heavily medicated because they have gone undiagnosed, the diagnosis is ignored/is hidden or the diagnoses were not understood?

How many people with this diagnosis have been falsely accused of a crime they didn’t commit or understand it was a crime due to the nature of their disability and their UNINTENTIONAL BEHAVIORS? How many people with this diagnosis have been incarcerated? How many lives have been lost and our society will continue to lose due to the secondary diagnosis of anxiety, stress, depression, and panic attack? Think about it. I hope this will help millions of people.

How can our society continue to violate the HUMAN and CIVIL RIGHTS of people with this diagnosis? This is in the DEFENSE for NLD SYNDROME. NLD Mom/cancer survivor

Giving Recognition To The Unrecognized__Saving Lives

by Linda Ballard

We give recognition to people, things, places, and subjects that are identifiable and previously known. Through encounters of their existence, we give validation to their achievement. This makes them credible and recognizable. Recognition is the most talked about and the latest trend.  Those who are rich, famous and recognizable suffer from SHAME, GUILT, and FEAR of HUMILIATION…  They battle knowing a problem exists or has been in existence for a long period time. The greatest FEAR for the people who are recognizable is someone will find out about their problem. They will lose their reputation and their  3G network (Glimmer, Glamour, and Gold) that comes along with their fame.  The people who go unrecognized is just the opposite. No credit is given to the unrecognizable. Their problems are masked, hidden, disguised and unknown. At this time or any time the unrecognized is definitely not the trend. Given no support from their community, no validation, the burden of SHAME and GUILT lies heavy in their hearts.

This is a welcome mat for  ISOLATION.  Those who feel the burns of SHAME, GUILT, FEAR, and ISOLATION may be tempted to glance into the window of SUICIDE. ISOLATION is their choice. They give themselves a hall pass for denial and it feeds the SHAME, GUILT, and FEAR. The unrecognized has fewer choices. The choice of ISOLATION is granted by the one that judges them. Judgment is not placed in their hands. They have poor judgment and put their lives in the hands of people who cannot be trusted.  The unrecognized will suffer the pain and agony of many cuts by the ones who judge, leaving them with lack of confidence and low self-esteem. This is a deficit for NLD and other exceptionalities. This can apply to the those with recognition.

It is very difficult for people to see themselves as having a problem or understanding the problems of others. It is twice as hard for them to express themselves.  They do not have the ability to recognize the unrecognizable.  NLD (Nonverbal Learning Disability) and many others fall into this category. A Neurological disorder with unintentional behaviors carries a distorted view through life’s window. These disorders cannot recognize the SHAME and GUILT due to a mass amount of confusion, frustration, anger, and ISOLATION. Those who have unique learning styles and extraordinary minds are ridiculed and rejected by others. They are not given the opportunity to become socially and emotionally competent.  WHY?  People feel it takes too long to teach them. There are too many accommodations needed to help them get from point A to B.  Many people feel the process is taking too long and they need results NOW. Once the behaviors cut loose for NLD, SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) and anyone else that has an unrecognizable neurological disorder, it is all over for them. Just being unrecognized with no disorders is a problem. You are basically on your own. It is hard for people to understand the behavior or tolerate dealing with the behaviors of those who are not under the umbrella of the Autism Spectrum. Those who are recognized and under the Autism Spectrum includes Autism, Asperger, PDD-NOS, Rett Syndrome and Childhood Disintegrative Disorders. It is very difficult to deal with recognizable or unrecognizable behaviors when you are uneducated about them.

The psychological effect can take a toll on your life. Hiding, not knowing when it will all surface. How will you react?  My friends that have gone before me have left a message.  You are looking out of the window and your body gets too close to the edge, ask yourself which one is it. Is it your mind or your body that is too close? If it is your mind, look across the way and try to realize and recognize other people may have greater problems. If it is your body step back and remember the ones whose bodies were ridden with cancer and still fought to maintain what was left of their mind. This was their Quality of Life.  Before you sway too far out of the window and indulge in the thoughts of SUICIDE think about the SHAME, GUILT, and HUMILIATION you will place on your loved ones, your family, and your friends.  Think about it, get help, and save your life and others who love you. Don’t sink a ship.

The poem Rest Peaceful My Nubian Queen is dedicated to one of my great mentors. She taught me whenever it is time to go to the hospital always Remember that you can Remember. Always ask for a bed not by the window, but by the door. Look across the way and focus on the pain of another and your pain will diminish.

For those who are unrecognized, a chain of events will happen. You will struggle to gain respect and validation. It may take many years.  It has taken many years for the American Psychiatric Association to give NLD (Nonverbal Learning Disability) or SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) any recognition. They have not done so to this date. TIME is a precious commodity. All  IN TIME.

To the President of the United States: You have been riding on the wave of a tsunami. You have looked across the way.  The words you spoke transmitted respect to the life of an infamous recognizable now laid to rest. It was a life. You held steadfast to your 3Ps and in my book, you will always be given Recognition.

To  Catherine-Zeta Jones: You are not alone. I’m proud you came forward. You have taken the first step for the rest of your life toward healing. The SHAME, GUILT, FEAR, and ISOLATION lies in the label of MENTAL ILLNESS. Far too long many people have been stereotyped and have been afraid to seek help. I have sat behind the chart for many years with my son who is now 22 years of age. It was his diagnosis that has given me the extensive knowledge in the field of the neurosciences. My son is a masterful educator and one of my greatest mentors. He struggles in his life but we address every aspect of his neuropsychological disorder which is brain-based. This is the mental aspect where there are deficits in areas of writing, math, abstract language, social communication skills and more.  I have sat behind another chart. I sign off on my tweets as NLD Mom/cancer survivor, if I don’t run out of space. I can talk about my breast cancer. This is a physical illness. I lost a breast but it saved my life.

This story is about saving lives and the choices we make to help save others. Today, many women can take another route to conserve their breast, just as long as they conserve their mind and life with their choice.  If I can talk about a physical illness then others should be able to talk about their mental illness with NO Shame In Their Game.  Always remember you ask for help, you wanted to learn, and you wanted to live and SURVIVE. Today I give RECOGNITION to the most stereotypical illness in the medical profession. MENTAL ILLNESS–Let’s talk and raise awareness for MENTAL HEALTH and SAVE LIVES. NLD Mom/cancer survivor